Our partners “marry” for our parents. Are you surprised? But it is so. What does a child see in childhood, what flashes before his eyes every day, every minute? There are a maximum of three patterns of behavior, three programs: how the mother interacts with the child, how the child interacts with the mother, and how the mother interacts with the father. And then by mixing all this, a partner is obtained. In any relationship, we can take on the role of a child, or we can take on the role of a mother. And then, if in childhood a child saw his mother wet his father, then he will grow up and find someone whom he will wet, like his mother. And if the mother wet both the father and the child, then most likely he will grow up and find an abusive husband/wife who will wet her/him. And then there’s the “myth” that children repeat the “fate” of their parents? "Myth", are you serious? This is also how the program of repeating parental behavior patterns works. That program that the children’s parents “diligently” laid down, perhaps without even knowing it. And when we, parents, no matter what we do when interacting with a small child, learn to see and ask ourselves the question: “This is this scheme/pattern/program that you are laying down.” , is this what you wish for your child in the future? Of course, here and now it is very convenient for the baby to be comfortable. It's not easy to raise a free child. Then the parent violates his own interests. But then it will be convenient for the wife, and for the boss, and for friends. “Do you want such a life for your child?” "No, I want him to be the leader." “What a leader, you are already spreading rot on him, and, in any case, then others will spread rot on him, it cannot be any other way.” Everything that you lay down will be realized later. Well, he kicks a little in adolescence, and that’s all. And then everything will fall into the same pattern. And you will say: “How unlucky he is with his wife.” "Seriously? So it’s all of you who laid it down.” Therefore, one of the coolest skills is to understand what kind of program parents are laying out now, and it will work exactly the same in adulthood. Only instead of a mother and father, he will find himself a wife, a boss, and friends who will simply “take out” his parents.