From the author: I become richer when I have me, you have you and we have us. What does a healthy relationship look like? How should I feel about this? How can I achieve this? How will I know if this is what I need? These are very important and pressing questions that need to be answered. Each of us has a need for healthy close relationships. The definition of what exactly is included in the concept of “healthy” is also relevant for everyone. Be confident that you are in a healthy intimate relationship if you can affirm the following: 1. I can be me. 2. You can be you. 3. We can be us. 4. I can grow. 5. You can grow. .6.We can develop together. In essence, this is the most important thing. It's amazing that a healthy relationship allows me to be myself - and at the same time I still don't know who I am, because the process of self-discovery lasts a lifetime. Even though you may not have a real sense of self, you can immediately sense when you are not being allowed to be yourself. You feel it when you are treated as if you were walking on glass. You feel it when you are afraid of making a mistake. In reality, the freedom to be yourself means that your partner will not interfere in your life or judge you for who you are or who you want to become. You, in turn, also give your partner freedom. You accept him as he is and try to change him by manipulating him with love. You don't get caught up in your fantasies about what your partner should be like and then start making it happen. You focus on the real person. “I accept you unconditionally, and you accept me unconditionally” - this is the basis, the essence. This does not mean that changes in character and behavior are undesirable or impossible. This only means that you accept the person for who he is. “We are free to be ourselves” - each couple determines for themselves what common values ​​and interests to build their relationship on. First, people must understand what the values ​​of each of them are, and only then can they build the common from the individual. Some differences are unimportant and can be ignored or worked through. For example, problems such as “You never close your toothpaste”, or even such as different religions, can be easily solved if desired. But there are also very important things that you need to work on in order to maintain and develop relationships. Examples of more serious cases: “I don’t want children” or “I don’t want to see your mother anymore.” Any positive experience can be enhanced if you share it with a partner. Enjoying the sunset together, walking on the beach, having a delicious dinner - these are examples of the “we” that makes us want close relationships: “I become richer when I have me, you have you and we have us.” Healthy relationships create the conditions for you to grow. In this supportive atmosphere, you help your partner do the same. So through your own development, you grow together as a couple. Relationships also develop through setting common goals and achieving them together. And here what is more important is not even the goals, but the process itself, which allows the relationship to develop. It doesn't matter whether you achieve your goal or not. - it is important that you share this experience. Intimacy means that you have a loving relationship with another person in which there is mutual understanding, in which you feel valued intellectually, emotionally and physically. The more you share, the greater your intimacy. A healthy relationship should never be a power struggle. You both don't have to think about everything the same way. A healthy relationship is not a symbiosis or dissolution in another person. You don't have to have the same thoughts and feelings. Healthy relationships are about more than just sex, they're about the joy of sharing what's important to you and discovering new things together..