Who is to blame that you are tired That you didn’t find what you were waiting for You lost everything that you were looking for Rise into the sky and fell And whose fault is it that day after day Life passes in someone else’s way And your house has become lonely And empty outside your window "Resurrection" "Who is to blame?" and "What should I do?" - two eternal Russian questions. They are asked about everything: politics, society, personal life, career. But they answer completely differently. Some blame a foreign enemy for all their failures, some blame their relatives, and some blame only themselves, falling into depression and masochism. As for solving your problems, there are much fewer answers. Few people are truly sure of what they really should do to make life better. I think that a person can blame anyone for his failure, even the reptilians from the planet Niberu, but the real blame lies with himself and the social community around him. cultural environment. In different cases, the percentage of responsibility is different (50% to 50%, 60% to 40% or 30% to 70%). A newly born child is very weak and highly dependent on the environment. The world presses on him from all sides and the child has to adapt and beg from his mother and father the necessary dose of love, attention and care. It’s great if the mother and father are psychologically mature people and give him everything he needs in full, but more often they themselves are traumatized and neurasthenic. That is why changes in neuroses are a task of social order, since. One American psychologist said that psychology is the profession of the future. This is true, because the number of borderline disorders is growing every year. Various forms of obsessive behavior, addiction, drug addiction, depression - all this is growing in arithmetic progression. And psychologists themselves can’t cope. And how many people don’t ask for help when necessary... And then the relatives don’t understand why the person jumped out of the window, everything seemed to be fine. Not everything, apparently. So, if we want to stop the growth of psychopathologies, we must transform our socio-cultural environment into something else, or create another artificial one. I mean that the environment should become charitable for a person’s mental state, healing for his traumatized soul. But there is one nuance that ruins all our dreams into dust. The fact is that people are, by and large, infantile and irresponsible. I saw many people who wanted to get rid of their problems, remove the rake from under their feet, take responsibility for their lives and change it. But this was only their conscious position. In their unconscious, they had a powerful counterweight that did not allow them to realize their plans for self-improvement. All these people held on to their neuroses and disorder; it was beneficial for them to be in an unhealthy state, just as it is beneficial for an official to take bribes and steal from the city budget. Even when a person spends a lot of effort to solve his visible mental problems, in reality he does not want to solve them, because every problem, every bad habit, every fear - all of them are beneficial to him and more necessary. He simply does not want or cannot admit it to himself. Survey about happiness (please take it): https://vk.com/lifeofpsy