BEHAVIOR is not just “going to the store” or “getting a job.” Behavior is any action of the muscles of the body. Muscles that are controlled by signals from nerves. “How did he behave?” - Based on that question, you can understand that behavior is a much broader concept. Behavior includes wrinkling of the eyebrows (eyebrows are muscles, muscles are controlled by nerve signals), a scream (vocal cords are also controlled by nerves), a blow with a hand, a muscular contraction of the shoulders from fear, and even silence when it was necessary I would say, and so on. Muscles are controlled by nerves. The nerves receive a signal from the head telling them what to do in a given situation. When our behavior is too irrational, agitated and we act under the influence of emotions - that's when the problems begin. That’s when you want to learn to behave differently. Change your behavior. And if behavior is caused by emotions, therefore, you need to master your emotions, your feelings. FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS INFLUENCED BEHAVIOR There are usually four main groups of feelings. If you have ever experienced one of these under certain circumstances, you will not be able to cope with difficulties as effectively as you would like - you will most likely become upset and allow someone or something to unsettle you and exhibit inappropriate behavior. Such emotions include excessive anxiety, anger or resentment, depression, outburst of emotions or feelings of guilt (what does excessive mean, read in my blog EMOTIONS: functional and not so functional!). Firstly, if you are very worried about something (nervous , tense, upset, excited, scared, terrified, panicking), then you will not be able to behave correctly in the appropriate situation. For example, you feel nervous when applying for a job or talking to a strict boss; You get very upset when you can't complete work on time, or you have to make a vital decision, or you worry because your children have stopped listening. If so, then someone or something is influencing your life. Secondly, if you get too angry (offended, irritated, upset, indignant, offended, enraged), you are likely to explode. Perhaps you are truly offended when your husband or wife criticizes what you do, how you cook, how you raise children or make love. Or maybe it’s your teenage child who openly ignores your opinion and treats you with no respect, or your colleagues who are incompetent and uncooperative with you. There are millions of people around us who try to get on everyone’s nerves. Our goal is to learn not to succumb to the influence of others. Then no one will be able to make us angry unless we want it ourselves. You shouldn’t avoid people, hide from them, or convince yourself that you don’t care. Our method is to speak to them directly, according to the circumstances, without losing our cool. Our goal is to become more stress-resistant. If you are too depressed or irritated, you will not be able to react correctly in the appropriate situation and even risk finding yourself in a humiliating position. When you can't get out of depression for a long time because you lost a loved one, a job, or failed in your business, you thereby allow someone or something to get on your nerves. And finally, if you feel guilty (repent, reproach yourself, feel responsible for everything in the world), then those around you can easily get on your nerves, manipulate you, and you will not be able to objectively assess the situation and make a decision based on the wrong reasons (because you feel guilty or etc.). For example, you allow your children to escape punishment because you once divorced their father and feel guilty before them. Or you're wasting your time on someone you don't like at all just because you're "his only friend" and would feel like a villain if you stopped talking to him.™