September 1 has passed, someone took their child to school for the first time, and for others this is already a familiar story. But not for every parent, the release of their child into the world is a happy event. All children are different: obedient and not so obedient, calm and active, simple and difficult. But what does “difficult child” mean? Parents often hear this verdict for the first time when they go to school. A child who does not fit into the framework of ideas about how children should behave in society automatically goes into the category of “difficult.” I asked a very simple question on the Internet at otvet.mail.ru: “Who is a difficult child?” And I received several answers: - cannot be re-educated; - has pronounced leadership qualities, does not fit into the framework; - a child with whom an adult cannot find contact. These are the ideas about who a “difficult child” is expressed by parents. A daughter who, for some reason, does not accept the new rules the way an adult wants. A future leader who tires parents with his personal opinions and activity. Or a son with whom it is difficult for an adult to communicate. Analyzing the literature, you come to the understanding that there is no single answer to the question of who difficult children are. Everyone has their own meaning: scientific publications refer to giftedness, teachers call hyperactive, uncontrollable children this way, and parents tend to categorize almost every child with whom they have a hard time as “difficult.” When a child becomes incomprehensible even to his own parent and does not meet expectations, what can one expect from his behavior and relationship with the world as a whole? In the practice of a psychologist, unfortunately, it is not often that one encounters parents who show wisdom and patience with their children who do not meet traditional ideas about obedient children. Instead of help, difficult children receive criticism and punishment, although it is in the parents’ power to provide their child with such support that will allow them to become a successful person from an outsider. Children who are especially sensitive and vulnerable very often also fall into the difficult category. They experience life’s difficulties and stresses with difficulty, they react faster and more vividly to adversity, which, of course, is reflected in their behavior. Such children acutely feel both the atmosphere prevailing in the family and the emotions of their parents, even if they skillfully hide them. But the child does not know what to do with his emotions and experiences, how to cope with the storm that is gaining strength inside. In the best case, the parents of these children end up in a psychologist’s office, but for some, the label “difficult child” becomes a good cover to ignore the needs and characteristics of your son or daughter. As adults, we often emphasize our individuality, our special features, so try to look at your child’s behavior from the same perspective. Assume that your child does not have a “good” or “bad” character, but that he simply has one, he is unique and sometimes requires flexibility and understanding on your part. Some children do not require special efforts from parental education, but there are also those whose needs are higher. And the main task of a parent should not be re-education, but to help the child adapt to life. It seems to you that your child is obstinate, does everything out of spite and contrary to your demands, but maybe this is a future leader, which, according to research, is not so much. Maybe you shouldn’t try so hard to subordinate him to general rules, but direct your zeal in the direction of the child’s interests. Many parents adhere to the belief that they need to be even stricter and more demanding with such children, but using such tactics, believe me, this war cannot be won. Difficult children, no matter what meaning is put into this concept, need your love, patience, physical and emotional involvement, attention, care and your maturity. Such children require more effort from their parents, which is why it can be so difficult, but if you find the resources to support your child, the result will be.