What does such a symptom as “addiction” tell us? That reality has become completely unbearable and we urgently need to escape from it into some alternative, preferably more pleasant and less conscious. And sometimes this symptom shouts: “Notice me! Please!!!!” And this method, sadly enough, is a win-win. Sometimes I tell the guys in the rehab. center about codependency, about overprotection, and there are always several people to whom he does not respond. They have a different story. Mom worked a lot, tried to arrange her life after her father left, or simply “didn’t notice” that she had become a mother. Or dad - the story is the same. The children complain that they bought them everything, of course, but there was no love, attention, affection, or “calf tenderness.” The phrase they most often heard: “Well, what do you need? I buy you everything!!” Later it turns out that these guys were sick a lot in childhood. This was the only way to find out that mom/dad loves and notices. We grew up and got sick differently. And then it turns out that stopping “being sick” = not receiving manifestations of love. This is one of the reasons for unconscious resistance to recovery. The horror is that when sending their child to rehabilitation, the parent continues to remain in the same position: “I’m paying for you! What else do you need?” (“I’m great, I do everything for your good, but you are not grateful!”) And changing this position is incredibly difficult, since the parent himself is in serious denial. Fortunately, there are examples where a parent, noticing changes in a child, opens up in response or gains the courage to acknowledge this reality. And then, attracting the help of psychologists and chemistry specialists. addictions, self-help groups, the process begins and, as in that song, “the ice melts” between them :) And the process is long and difficult - learning to love and notice yourself and others. And traditionally, bad advice! *Never pick up a child in your arms, not in Do not kiss or hug under any circumstances! *Also stop all his attempts to do this towards you. *If you suddenly feel that you have done something wrong, do not apologize. Don't ask for forgiveness! Buy a toy/smartphone/tablet and present it with an expression on your face as if nothing had happened before. *Leave your child alone at home, no matter how old he is. You can also leave it to grandmothers, girlfriends and any persons who do not express a strong reluctance to sit with him. *If a child shows you his drawings/crafts/grades, etc., do not pay attention. This is not interesting.* Well, the most important thing! REMEMBER!!! Don't spend time with your child. You have no time, you need to work and earn money for his own good! So that he is no worse than everyone else! So you're doing everything right, but he's just small and doesn't understand anything. He will appreciate it when he grows up. Something like this. There are also thoughts about the causes of addictive behavior. I will definitely share them with you :) I look forward to questions, comments, opinions !