Motherhood is hard work 24/7, many responsibilities, responsibilities and a lot of worries. Anxiety for your child is normal. If a child is sick or has some difficulties, if the mother herself is very tired, then an increase in anxiety in such a situation is inevitable. This situation is often observed when raising children under one and a half years old. In caring for the child, the mother forgets about herself and loses contact with her needs. And here it is important to find an opportunity to ask yourself questions: how long have I been drinking and eating? How long have I been on vacation? The solution to the issue will be the opportunity to negotiate with someone close to you for help and find an opportunity to restore your resources. But what to do if worry about your child does not let you go even when there are no special external reasons for this? The causes of anxiety can be psychological and not obvious at first glance: The mother's desire for ideality, perfectionism. This could be: - a mandatory desire to conduct educational games with the child, even when you want to sleep; - do homework for the schoolchild so that he receives exceptionally excellent grades; - cook soup not for a couple of days in a large saucepan, but cook it fresh every day so that the child eats varied and correct, and all this against the backdrop of complete ignorance of one’s needs for relaxation, entertainment and personal space. Such a constant struggle for the title of “best mother” completely absorbs a woman’s entire resource, exhausts her and leaves her with background anxiety for the child’s condition. What to do? - Ask yourself: You won’t do something. What's going to happen? What will happen? - Analyze your childhood: who and when demanded that you conform to the ideal image? How relevant are these requirements now? - Think about the balance of benefit and harm from your behavior towards your child. You do his homework for him, which means you amputate the ability to cope with his own affairs. You almost forcefully pull off his shirt to iron a dent on the sleeve, which means you are passing on to him a kind of “curse of ideality,” your perfectionism. The next psychological reason for increased anxiety for the child is painful control. The mother thinks: if I now go to visit a friend, what if my husband will not be able to keep track of the child, what if he feeds him something wrong, what if he loses him on a walk... Life is like this Mom is full of fears and assumptions: “What if...” What to do? - Learn to see people around, especially your loved ones, capable and adequate. Your husband is not a 10-year-old boy and is able to look after your common child. The grandmother to whom you leave child at night, does not wish him harm and will definitely make sure that he eats. - Little by little, delegate your powers to your loved ones and watch the result. You will notice that they cope with the assigned tasks quite well, even if they do not do it as perfectly as you. Your task is to learn to manage the level of anxiety within yourself by asking the question: What terrible thing will happen if your husband walks with the child for not the prescribed two hours, but only an hour ?What terrible thing will happen if grandma pampers your child with one piece of candy before dinner? Admit it to yourself honestly: nothing fatal or irreparable will happen. - Explain to yourself that you cannot save your child from life, hide him in your pocket or cover him with a dome. This It’s normal to hurt your knee while walking to understand that it’s better not to run at that speed. Give your child the opportunity to understand what he can and cannot do. Understand what boundaries this world has. Let him draw his conclusions and “fill his cones.” Think about what consequences await him if he doesn’t do this. Another reason may be the demands of society. If in the time of our grandmothers it was enough for education that the child was simply well-fed and dressed, now the requirements have increased noticeably. The mother must feed, provide, entertain, teach, and develop the child’s talents. Therefore, if you take your child to courses.