HOW DO YOU LIVE WITH FEARS? Today we’ll talk about the fear of being a bad mother, father, and how often many are faced with the fear of never becoming a good parent for their child. If the example of your own parents does not inspire delight , then fear will naturally be present. And even if the parental example inspires respect, fear and doubt are still present: they managed it, but what about me? From today’s psychoanalytic session: - I’m afraid that what if it happens that I don’t look after the child and something happens to him. I'm afraid to live my whole life blaming myself, feeling guilty. - What exactly will happen? Can you give an example that scares the most? - For example, he will fall so hard that he will lose some limb forever. (((- At what age? - Good question... for example, at 12 years old. - At 12 years old, a child is already teenager. Do you accept the idea that he is already aware that, for example, jumping from a height, he can crash? - Yes - You admit that this is his choice to understand the world, and therefore his responsibility for the consequences. - Yes... and how should I react to this choice? - Let’s say your son chose to love boys. How will you react to this choice? - Oh, no problem here. I’ll accept it. - And you won’t feel guilty 😊 - No, of course? , this is his choice. - In the case of his choice to understand the world through jumps and fractures, the same. Parents introduce the child into this world in every sense: physically and psychologically. They explain: what is possible and what is not, what is good and bad, what are the fingers. It’s dangerous to stick into a socket, that touching a hot iron/kettle is painful... and this happens until a certain age. Each child has his own age when he begins to explore the world on his own without the accompaniment of his parents. He makes his own mistakes, faces his own pain. It’s good if the child knows for sure that there is a parental home where he can bring this pain, disappointment, mistake and get analysis of what happened without judgment or criticism and in any case receive support. When he knows no matter what happens, the parent will say: “I am on your side.” This acceptance is valuable. This support gives strength and confidence. If you didn’t have supportive parents and have doubts about yourself, come and let’s sort it out. If you are in doubt: are you a good parent, come, we’ll sort that out too. You can sign up in a personal message. You will gain confidence in yourself as a person and as a fairly good parent.😊 PS I am posting the above dialogue with the client’s permission.#dialogue_with_client