From the author: Simple, not abstruse and useful! Hello again! We continue to get ourselves into shape after a breakup, quarrel or temporary separation from a person close to us (read the beginning in the articles “How to survive a breakup: 4 secrets. Part 1 and 2”). The sphere of “contacts” is our sphere of life, which implies emotional connections with our near and dear people, as well as our communications with the environment. At such moments, she can and most likely will be extremely necessary for us in order to weaken our emotional dependence on the previous man and on the event as a whole. I definitely won’t reveal many secrets here, since, thank God, we all intuitively strive for communication when “not very good” for us. Of course, we can sit and lick our wounds alone, but sooner or later we “poke our nose out of the hole” and show interest in those “others who are outside.” Here’s what some of my clients wrote about our conversation today: “To my great surprise, talking to my friend’s daughter helped me. We chatted about nothing, I remembered myself as a carefree girl and enjoyed the spontaneity of a child. I was “treated” by her joy in life. This became hope for me, and the fact that we were not in a place became less “deadly and unsurvivable.” Oksana D. “I spat on all my decency, and my friends and I talked about such obscenities that I could not even think about before.” Sveta A. “For two weeks I lived the life of a sister. I couldn't stay alone. I looked at how and what she did, I helped her in everything, we talked and joked like in childhood. We painted and talked. We cooked and talked. We bought magazines and dreamed about outfits. I saw that there was someone else in my life who loved me so much. I forgot about it. I’ve been in a strong relationship with Him for too long.” Katya V. The process of separation is a process of separation and liberation from the usual way of life. No matter how undesirable it may be, this process is inevitable and it is advisable to use as many resources as possible to make it proceed more easily.[b]No secret 3 (for contact and emotions)[/b]Talk to yourself and out loud. It is important that the thoughts that are spinning and “blowing your mind” are spoken out. Say everything. Wail and get angry, cry and whine, feel sorry for yourself and sing. Do everything most “inappropriate” that may seem at first glance. Speaking about the therapeutic effect, we can note the benefit of releasing accumulated energy for a partial inventory of feelings and experiences. You “ate” the pain, now it’s time to “release” it (the physiological need to eat and poop). Talk to your friend. The female support of a close friend will help and “heal” the wounded female body and soul. It is only important to understand what effect you want. If you continue to “blame Him” with her for a long time, then you may develop a negative attitude towards all future men, according to the principle “all are assholes.” This will allow you to assure yourself that you are not responsible for the breakup and that you are simply a “victim” of circumstances. Another effect is self-flagellation. It's not good either. And it’s so hard to believe in yourself as a woman after a failed relationship. Talk to your friends about something neutral that has nothing to do with you or him. Your future love relationships will be formed precisely from an honest understanding of your attitudes towards men in general. Talk to your surroundings. As soon as you come back to yourself, get dressed, do a little “tuning” and go to a company or public place. This is the best way to raise self-esteem, and the opportunity to get new impressions, besides a wet handkerchief or valerian with cigarettes, will also appear. On my own behalf, I will add, try not to hang around in anger and self-pity. Both make mistakes in relationships and breaking up a relationship is the work of each. Just take care of yourself in pleasant company.