From the author: sexologist-psychotherapist, family psychologist. expert on television programs, member of the professional psychotherapeutic league, master of NLP, educational psychologist, specialist in the eastern version of neuroprogramming, specialist in personal well-being and family relationships, trainer, coach, esoteric psychotherapist. The author of more than 500 articles on a variety of problems, which you can see by looking at the *articles* section and, probably, this will already help solve your problem. The author of more than 100 training programs, as you can see by visiting my video channel on YouTube and typing “Afanasyeva Liliya” This is what my client from Moscow said, who came to see me as a sexologist, psychotherapist, and family psychologist. She - a woman, about forty years old. She has been married for a long time. The relationship with her husband is quite good, but somehow the sex is not going well. I must say that the client was never particularly hot, as she said: she always felt that the problem was anorgasmia. As for my husband, for him sex was a purely technical aspect of satisfying his male sexual needs, but he didn’t really try to insist on sex, knowing his wife’s temperament, and in general, sex happened once or twice a month. usually without foreplay, and lasted about 5 minutes, from the series: in a quick way, i.e., some ordinary side of sex was traced, according to the principle: “let’s do it” - “come on...” My client from Moscow wanted to change somehow situation, and, moreover, to remove internal obstacles, and the children's complexes that lived in it lay at the basis of anorgasmia, and did not allow them to discover the woman in themselves. Now she would like to change the perception of the process of sex itself. And, perhaps, work with the topic: “I can have fun with myself, but not with my husband.” It is worth noting that the client’s expectations from the same sexual marital or individual psychotherapy must be realistic. And in this case, I always explain that it is impossible to want sex with your husband the way you did before (especially since it was never clearly manifested). We make allowances for the fact that the hormonal storm has passed, everything is calm and somewhat ordinary, and from this we begin to start, correcting the situation little by little. We have come to the conclusion of a female sexual problem: allowing yourself to experience an orgasm. To eliminate a woman's sexual problem, we began to work through the obstacles and the cause of her anorgasmia. There was tension here, plus this interesting state: “I want to hurt a man” (she could even hit her husband). This topic was tied to sex, when a woman refused her husband and felt that he was worried about this, while my client from Moscow received some pleasure from what was happening. The situation looked somewhat strange, and when I, as a sexologist, psychotherapist, and family psychologist, went deeper into the problem, I came to the conclusion that her stepfather had been pestering her for sex when she was still a girl. She doesn’t remember for certain whether there was sexual intercourse or not, but the man harassed her for a long time and showed off his genitals. Hence, the concomitant aversion to sex has already begun to appear. It is worth noting that the client, for herself, “digested” this situation, and already, in part, let it go, and it was not so difficult for me to remove the accompanying negative states that I voiced above. Plus, to all this, we have eliminated aggression towards men. It must be said that when she became older, she was able to fight back her stepfather, saying that if he approached her now, she would jump out the window. The girl began to understand that this was not normal, but her mother either didn’t want to see it or didn’t believe the girl. In the end, be that as it may, it was all over. In this situation, we eliminate the person’s negative experience, and it disappears from thoughts, the woman lets go of the situation. Next, we work through the accompanying stories that came after. Here another memory appeared that worked like