“Why is the room a mess again?” “No last minutes, start homework immediately!” “What kind of dog are you? Who will look after her? I already have a lot to do.” Every child hears such words at least once in their life from their parents, and does not understand why their parents are so strict, so grown-up and so boring? “After all, they themselves were once small and were in my place, don’t they really remember how annoying these boring, strict phrases were,” flashes through my thoughts. We offer you an unusual task: together with us, try to understand your parents. It could be a good union. After all, your parents are trying to understand you and find an approach to you, and when you also try to understand them, communication can become more pleasant and easier. Of course, there are quarrels and misunderstandings between any parents and children - this is normal. At such moments, it seems that mom and dad don’t understand you, as if you are speaking a language unknown to them. Because you speak the language of children, and they speak the language of their parents, and their language is also unclear to you. And they haven’t yet come up with a school where parents learn the language of their children, and children learn the language of their parents. Each family can have its own school like this. And you can organize it together with your parents, and even become its director. Imagine, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa will become students, and you can teach them to speak your own language, which only you understand for now. For example, you can tell how you like to start the morning and end the evening before going to bed. Agree with your parents on how best to wake you up, with what words and what you definitely want to do before bed, maybe read a couple of pages of your favorite book. Then your parents will be able to work with you to make your morning good and your evening joyful. Tell your parents how they need to ask you correctly so that you want to fulfill their request. Maybe the request should begin with the word “please” or you should be affectionately called by name. Come up with secret words together that will be known only to you and will mean, for example: “Mom, another 5 minutes and I will fulfill your request.” You can arrange an exchange of experience and expand your knowledge - learn the language of your parents. It may turn out to be interesting and useful for the future - you, too, will one day become a parent. When you especially don't understand the language of adults, you can ask them to explain why they said or did something. This will help you understand them better, and then you won’t have to be offended or angry with them. Then you can agree on everything instead of quarreling with your parents. You’ve probably thought, why don’t your parents understand you, since they were children themselves? Why is it so difficult for them to remember this time when they didn’t want to finish the game and go to bed, didn’t want to take part in cleaning the house and putting their things in order, but instead, without stopping, watched a new cartoon or did what they loved? Sometimes it’s difficult for them remember yourself when you were little. Because most of the time the head is occupied with what is happening in life right now, in the present. When your parents became adults, they had different adult tasks that they needed to spend time and energy on. With age, people's interests change, the complexity of the tasks for which they must be responsible increases. And sometimes several important concerns in the life of parents happen simultaneously, when none of them can be postponed until later. For example, a cat is sick and needs to be taken to the veterinarian, help with the children’s homework, meet dad from a business trip, cook dinner, help grandma move, prepare a report at work, and also go to that same job. The number, importance, complexity and urgency of such parental concerns can change like in your colored kaleidoscope, and it happens that moms and dads are simply tired and go to bed with a new to-do list for tomorrow in their heads. And there is absolutely no time left for parents to be little again, to return tochildhood and remember what it’s like to be a child and understand the language of children. And of course, being a parent means being an adult, responsible, serious and sometimes strict. Then it is especially difficult for your parents to speak the same language with you. Because sometimes they need to make decisions about you, limit you in some ways, maybe even ban you. For example, when you find it difficult to tear yourself away from an interesting program on TV and start doing your homework, or when you want to run around without a hat in the cold, your parents are right there with an explanation of why you need to turn off the TV and immediately put on a hat. Well, what child would want to do this himself? This cannot be done without a firm decision from the parents. Being a parent also means taking care of you, protecting you and passing on your knowledge to you. After all, they are responsible for your upbringing and should help you learn to live in the world around you and communicate with other people. To make it convenient for people to communicate with each other and live together in one world, people gradually agreed on the rules of communication with each other. There are many such rules, and your parents introduce you to them so that it is easy for you to communicate and make friends. That’s why you can often hear from your parents: “Don’t be rude, it’s unpleasant for other people,” “Don’t interrupt when two people are talking,” “Respect your elders and don’t offend the little ones.” It turns out that being a parent is not an easy task. You need to do a lot of things, take care of a lot, make a lot of decisions, rest a little and return to your worries again. With so much to worry about, parents may not keep track of everything and may begin to forget the language you speak. If we don't practice a foreign language for a long time, we begin to forget it. For parents, the language of children is also a foreign language, and you can help your mom and dad to be good parents for you. Help them understand you and have the patience to remind them how to speak your language. When you were very little and knew almost nothing, your parents taught you to walk, talk, eat on your own, dress yourself, answered your endless “whys” and much more. times they explained the same thing, how the world works, how to understand what is good and what is bad, how to be careful and polite, and much more. So you need to explain to your parents several times how they can understand you and what it means when you you remain silent in response to their stern question. Maybe you are afraid that they will scold you, or you think that they will not understand you, or they will laugh at you. When they understand your actions, you can talk to your parents, discuss any issue or conflict, and find a solution together. And vice versa, when your parents don’t understand your behavior, they can get angry and scold you. In the same way, you sometimes get offended by your parents when it’s not clear to you why you’re scolding. “Well, is it really necessary to scream like that because of some spilled jar of perfume from mom’s bedroom or because it took a long time to answer dad’s call?” - you think. And you can always ask them to explain to you why they reacted that way. Dad was most likely worried and worried if everything was okay with you when he couldn’t reach you, mom might have been upset because this perfume was her favorite and dad brought it from some distant country. So, if it becomes difficult for you to raise your parents, remember that: parents and children look at many things differently, parents do not always understand what is happening to you, why you behave this way, and therefore may be angry and upset because of your behavior ,parents can get tired of a huge amount of worries, and forget what it is to be a child and how to understand your language, sometimes they need your help in learning to speak to you in your language, you can ask your parents to tell you why they are angry or scolding you, what behavior of yours upset them, if you don’t understand why they make a decision or forbid you something, you can ask them to explain why, you can always discuss any issue or conflict with your parents - two people can always.