This is a question not only for single women, but also for those who are at the stage of pre-divorce or divorce. Although they voice that they “wouldn’t look at men anymore,” “they’re all goats,” “one is easier,” and “I haven’t yet cured my nerves from this,” everything in the world exists according to the law of “pairing.” Consciously or unconsciously, every person is looking for a mate. Indeed, it is easier for those who are lonely; they do not need time to “heal mental wounds”; the readiness to meet the chosen one is high. There are two options for choosing a life partner: for love or for business. Which one resonates with you? Intellectual choice, when you draw up an action plan, think through every step, analyze your actions. If a man is currently prone to alcoholism or is unemployed and an avid gambler, then hoping that your love will save him is at least naive. You will continue to be in the role of the Rescuer, and he will be the Victim or the Aggressor. An emotional choice - I can and will save everything, an intellectual choice - such an employee in my company will pull everyone to the bottom and ruin them. At the consultation there was a girl who had been physically abused by her husband. When asked whether he beat her before the wedding, the answer was positive. It is likely that her fear of loneliness was replaced by fear of her husband. Emotional choice? Yes! Only it is based on fear, not love. Can you independently distinguish one feeling from another? Also, the whole world is FOR love; an intellectual approach to choosing a companion is considered selfish. Psychologists have determined that the choice of a life partner depends 98% on imposed stereotypes, 2% is made up of one’s own desires. As a result, we often choose those with whom we have low compatibility. Conclusion: analyze, choose, compare. Apply the selection methods that I wrote about in previous posts. Don’t make a decision in an unstable emotional state of “falling in love”, or while looking at your passport - it’s time to give birth, and I’m not married yet! The more life experience, calmness and awareness, the better the choice. Therefore, get to know your chosen one as best as possible, go on a trip with him, meet his parents and friends. Are his interests and hobbies suitable for you? Make sure that you have a lot in common and that there are more “pros” of being together than “cons”. How significant are these “cons”? Are you willing to sacrifice something for it, what exactly, and is it worth it? Remember that a man cannot be changed. Basically, just like us! Your psychologist IRINA Kilina