She knows exactly what she should be. This was hammered into her even when the milk on her lips had not dried. She didn’t even have time to be born, but she already has so many Debts: She must obey her mom and dad, she must please her grandparents, she must respect her teachers, and she must also be: good, smart, neat, athletic, attentive, kind... And what did she want? What, they gave birth to her in vain? But in general they could have had an abortion... While I was only a daughter, granddaughter, and student, I somehow managed to turn around and fit the image. When I also became a wife, daughter-in-law, mother, and employee, the burden became completely unbearable. There are also a lot more Shoulds-Musts-Musts added. About herself, she knows exactly one more fact: she always falls just a little short of the ideal image that she Should be. I don’t know about you, but such Debts make me want to pull myself up😡 . And so does she, by the way. But she doesn’t know what she really is like. And what it’s like to be yourself, just a human being (imperfect, tender, sensitive, having the right to be tired, sad, angry, etc.) doesn’t know. Because she is an Automaton who owes something to everyone...Being Yourself means choosing what is good for Yourself, despite the fact that it may be inconvenient for Others. This is a risk of ceasing to be convenient for everyone. If you start choosing Yourself, then someone will definitely leave Your life. Yes, maybe let them go. The burden will become lighter, that’s for sure. The only real Duty we have is to ourselves. We must be honest with ourselves, we must understand ourselves, we must be true to ourselves, and we must deal only with ourselves if we feel the need for change. We will be happy ourselves, the people around us will become happier. I am simply grateful to my parents, teachers, mentors, with all my heart, for giving birth, raising and teaching. For children, yes, they must: raise them, teach them and let them go (push them out if they won’t let them go). A relationship with a spouse is a contract, everything is adult there. This is a completely different story. I choose to be Me. And You? A collective image. Has nothing to do with my clients.