First, let's talk about why to praise a child? Praise gives self-confidence Praise maintains motivation Praise builds trusting relationships Praise gives an understanding that a child is needed, loved, significant, his actions are observed and people are interested in him Praise is important and needed at any age! From infants to teenagers, and adults too, sometimes the support of loved ones is important. Here I won’t go into details, that an adult must already rely on himself, that there is a dependent emotional need for one’s need, approval, etc. This is all also from childhood, so we study parenting models, work on relationships, love without judgment and praise too) Most often we praise the child for grades, results, simply with phrases - “you are so smart, beautiful, well done, kind, you know everything,” etc. .d.But with these phrases we harm the child. If we praise him for unchangeable qualities, for something that the child did not put effort into, then: the child will begin to perceive mistakes as failures, because he was constantly praised for what was easy for him, and if he made a mistake, then he is no longer great , it is very difficult for such children to admit their mistakes! he will concentrate on looking smart rather than actually learning anything. The value of learning is lost. and most importantly, he will not be ready to make an effort, find the cause of the error and correct it. How should you praise a child? Praise NOT for being smart, but for doing a good job! “I’m so proud of you - you had to work out a lot” Such praise is called “growth mindset” Praise for behavior, diligence, for work, for the efforts made! Sometimes a child solves a task with a “3”, but how much effort did he put into it, how much work was put in to arrive in the top ten or simply accept participation in competitions, or maybe build a castle out of Lego or put together a puzzle. “You built such a high tower”, “I saw how long it took you to put this puzzle together, it’s amazing”, “what a bright cloud you made”, “you did it” . Lets the child know that you noticed his efforts. Positive attention to desired behavior is always more helpful than lectures about undesirable behavior. Praise must be honest and sincere. Don't use the standard "you're great" phrases. Say “I like...” “I like the way you sculpted this tree, I like the way you drew, I like the beautiful way you wrote the letter A.” There are no ratings in this phrase, only your feelings, your attitude. Don't discount the praise process. For example, a child does something out of motivation, he is passionate about this work, and at the same time you repeat for the hundredth time how great he is doing and what a great guy he is. If you are really overwhelmed with feelings, then say so, “I’m so glad that you found something that inspires you so much.” Do not compare your child with others while praising him. Yes, this can increase motivation, but not motivation “to”, but motivation “from”, that is, to motivate to be better than someone, to motivate to act out of fear of losing, fear of making a mistake. But we are still for healthy motivation through interest and pleasure. Focus on the needs of children, they are different at different ages. Kids need your kind look, approval, support, even if it seems simple to you - to take an object of the right color or assemble a pyramid, encourage their attempts to be independent, independent. Older children no longer need praise “how great you built the pyramid or great “that you know colors,” so praise for the obvious can be perceived with distrust or manipulation. Therefore, I repeat - sincerity, honesty, praise for effort, support the opportunity to enjoy the process. Thank you! Gratitude is similar to praise. You don’t have to constantly say “thank you,” but be grateful to the child, nod your head, smile, talk about your feelings. Take care of yourself and your loved ones! Your psychologist Yulia Zhigrina I will be glad to see your opinion in the comments and “thank you”) To discuss in more detail your tactics and strategies of education, reactions and models).