From the author: In our lives, we periodically encounter problems that require solutions. And such a decision needs to be made, and you want to make it so that you don’t scold yourself later because there were other, better options, but you didn’t see them.1. Expand your decision-making horizons. Avoid the traps of either-or thinking. In our lives, we periodically encounter problems that require solutions. And such a decision needs to be made, and you want to make it so that you don’t scold yourself later because there were other, better options, but you didn’t see them. For example, I left my parents’ family a long time ago and am renting an apartment. But the landlady constantly picks my brain and threatens to find a buyer, that is, she transparently hints to me that I need to look for other options for rented housing. And then I am faced with an alternative to move out now - to move out later. That is, the choice is yes or no. Move out or stay. Quit your job or not. Divorce your husband or not. Buy a car or not. Take out a loan or not. And here there are much wider options than yes-no, either-or .In the case of a rented apartment - . talk to the landlady about a small increase in price, agree to buy this apartment from her, buy another apartment, rent another apartment together with a friend, return to your parents (a bad option, but also possible) look for other options for renting housing so as not to move there at the last moment, where you don’t like it at all, and there are no other options. Regarding work, the algorithm is approximately the same. Talk to management about increasing your salary. About transferring to another department or to another position. Improve your qualifications at your workplace. Weigh the pros and cons of dismissal, write them down on paper. Just relax, and then decide. Regarding the divorce from your husband (wife). Try to improve the relationship. Contact a specialist in family relations. Find out what is wrong, what grievances there are on both sides, calmly discuss them. Take time-out, relax, someone can temporarily live with their parents. Watch films about family relationships. By the way, here is a wonderful film on this topic *Fireproof* 2008 (American). I watched it, I really liked it. Buying a car. Not necessarily buy an expensive car on credit, you can buy it cheaper. Rent a car. Buy a bicycle. Change an apartment closer to work. Change jobs. Sometimes take a taxi. Whether to take out a loan or not. This is generally a separate big topic. Because you take other people’s money for a short time, but give yours back forever, and even then with huge interest. It's always a risk. There is a possibility of falling into a debt trap for a long time. I am categorically against loans, but there are options here too. Borrow from relatives, friends, acquaintances. Save up. Earn more, get an additional job, take on part-time jobs. There are things necessary and sufficient for life , but there are extra ones. Often we take out a loan for something unnecessary - a new fashionable gadget (what a nasty word), an overly expensive car just to show off in front of someone or to emphasize our advantage. As my grandmother used to say, life is like a diamond on a beggar’s finger. Learn to be happy with what you have, while constantly striving for the best.2. More information about the issue of interest. Regarding the purchase of an apartment. Pay attention not only to the layout, convenience, renovation, view from the window, price, distance or proximity from work, but also to who lived in this apartment, how many owners there are, whether there are registered residents, where they are registered, the right to establish documents, how many times the apartment passed from one owner to another, whether there are disabled, mentally ill, children, whether they are worsening their living conditions by selling this apartment and buying another. Pay attention to communications, the year the house was built, the quality of major repairs or lack thereof, and payment for monthly services; they are often incommensurate with the quality of living. As a former realtor, I know this. Talk to the neighbors and find out who lived in this apartment and how and whether there will be othersapplicants for it, about whom you were deliberately not warned. There is a lot of additional information on this topic. If you want to purchase some expensive item, ask the seller not only about the advantages of this product, but also about its disadvantages. Wanting to sell a product, the seller will not tell you about this, but to your direct question you will be able to receive the same adequate direct answer.3. A good choice is a choice without emotions. Do not make decisions under the influence of momentary emotions. When emotions run high, the brain shuts down. You stop seeing what you see after this emotional flow subsides. How to deal with emotions - use Scarlett's method - I'll think about it tomorrow. The emotions may not be as strong tomorrow, but they may still be present. In this case, ask yourself how I will evaluate my decision in six months, a year, three years. This is very sobering and helps you look at some things more consciously and sensibly. Sometimes it's worth waiting a little to make the right decision for you. Just because you really want something doesn't mean that you need it or even that it's useful, it can often be the other way around. For example, go to a party where there will be a lot of alcohol, or stay at home with your family. What would you advise your friend, daughter, mother in this situation. This view allows you to step back from the emotional part and focus on the essence.4. Create your core values ​​Write down what is important to you. Money or convenience/creativity. Family or career. Simplicity and convenience or comfort and sophistication. Health Raising children Happiness of loved ones Personal fulfillment. When making a decision, be guided by your basic values, and not by emotions, the opinions of colleagues, neighbors or relatives, and even more so by social pressure or psychological manipulation.5. Look for simple solutions. Using the example of buying an apartment. Looking at 5 apartments to choose one is a simple decision and looking at 20 is a path that makes it very difficult to make a decision, since in each apartment there will be something that you like and you will be looking for an option where all 20 points come together in one apartment, and you will never find one like this, so we return to point 4, look at what we need first and choose an apartment based on basic values. For example, Proximity to work, Green area, Presence of a kindergarten-school, Or Proximity to relatives, Center with all its advantages, Parking, or Reasonable price, Isolated roomsHigh ceilings. Create your own selection criteria. And remember, choosing one option always entails giving up something else. That is, something will need to be sacrificed. And your choice will be optimal, that is, the best option of all those available at the moment.6. Shoot, then aim. If you are a young person who has not yet decided on a specialty, but already needs to work, then just try those options that more or less suit you, and then decide whether you want to continue working here or not. In any case, you gain valuable experience that will always be useful in life. If you want to change your place of residence more radically, move to another city, another country, try living there for a while. You will start a mechanism of adaptation to new living conditions, language, mentality, way of life and way of life and you will understand how comfortable or not you feel. If you don’t have your own experience, use someone else’s. Talk to people who have been through these situations and listen to their experiences. There is a lot of valuable stuff there.7. Lay down straws. Ask yourself uncomfortable questions more often, like: 1. What will I do if my business doesn’t pay off within a year? 2. If within such and such a period I do not reach a certain salary level?3 If I cannot repay the loan.?4. What if I don’t find a job in this country in my specialty? Questions like these will allow you to see hidden risks and prepare for them. Reserve the right to change your decision if such and such an unfavorable circumstance occurs. These!