There is a basic scheme of cognitive therapy in which the stimulus passes through the filter of beliefs and thoughts straight to the reaction, and it is the beliefs and thoughts that decisively influence the resulting behavior, be it observed actions, or emotions and new thoughts. We also have an idea of ​​a three-story concept of these thoughts and beliefs, and it is more like an iceberg than a house: The tip of the iceberg is automatic thoughts, fragmentary, poorly realized in the moment, but at the same time the most accessible for elaboration. Below are intermediate beliefs, beliefs and rules. They are more difficult to reach, beliefs and rules may be better understood by a person, and a person is inclined to defend them and resist the process of changing them. This is due, among other things, to the fact that beliefs and convictions are already cognitive structures of the individual, and working with everything that concerns the individual is associated with a number of obstacles. The base itself contains basic (suddenly) beliefs that are poorly or not at all understood by the client, and are considered to be very weakly amenable to change. Becoming aware of a core belief of your own is a great success in itself. Not too stuffy yet? We just have to wait a little longer. Also from the cognitive repertoire, we have at our disposal techniques for recording thoughts and emotions, and these, with additional modification, are means of changing thoughts and adapting to emotions. And all this allows a specialist, a psychologist, to create and dynamically change the idea of ​​the client, cognitive conceptualization. A kind of psychological portrait with an emphasis on the most important points for therapy. Armed with this set, as well as attentiveness and sensitivity, a psychologist can begin counseling to quickly understand how much the client does not care about all our cognitive tools, as well as about the wonderful world of cognitions, distortions, and even emotions, often. In the books they write that the first steps are getting to know each other, collecting information, establishing contact, and conceptualization. It is worth adding that in order to understand what the client wants from the psychologist, the client must know it and understand it himself. And this in itself acts as one of the goals, the first. After all, before conducting a CBT course for a young fighter for a client, it would be a good idea to first talk with him about what a psychologist can and cannot do. Otherwise, in the process of therapy, there is a risk of encountering the fact that cognitive practices and recording thoughts turn out to be of little help in increasing income, finding a girlfriend, or acquiring superpowers. All these words mean that next to the cognitive tools there should also be own approaches developed in practice for working with request modification, establishing proper contact and destroying the client’s faith in the omnipotence of the psychologist. The evil truth is that psychologists do not give advice, do not give recipes, and generally interpret the client’s manifestations with great caution, so questions in the spirit of “tell me how I feel here, help me understand what this behavior of mine means,” such questions not the address. Because no one but yourself can reliably know what you feel and what meaning your actions play for you. The psychologist does not have the goal of molding you into another person who agrees with the personal opinions, interpretations and beliefs of the psychologist himself. I understand that these are very scary and unpleasant words, but molding yourself and your life anew is your, and only your, area of ​​responsibility. If you realize at least this, it means that your work with a psychologist has not been in vain. sign up for a consultation +79153052716