Little Anya is growing up and loves to draw. But not just draw, but repeat pictures from your favorite book. Anya’s mother really doesn’t like that the girl “just copies drawings,” as if she has no ideas of her own. Every now and then, the mother laments to the girl: “Are you completely unprincipled? Anyone can draw. At least once you’ve done something worthwhile. Yulka has a daughter, what a talented girl she’s growing up! At the age of 6 she can already cross-stitch! What about you? Unlucky !" The girl Anya grows up and realizes that she has no special talents, does not understand her purpose in life, and suffers from low self-esteem. And mom keeps wailing and wailing...What do we see here? A girl programmed by the word of her own mother, who believed so strongly that she was not capable of anything, that many negative attitudes about herself were formed in her thinking: “I don’t mean anything,” “I’m stupid,” “I’m worse than others,”...Child is born with pure thinking. He thinks nothing of himself and others. He doesn’t know what he is like, what he’s been given, what he’s capable of. And all the thoughts that we have about ourselves or the world as a whole are always planted in us by someone! How can a child understand that he is not talented? Or is it ugly? Or worse than others? No way. Until someone tells him about it. The child feels valuable and equal simply by the fact of his existence. With age, this self-worth is replaced by self-esteem, when there is an eternal comparison with someone, as well as an indication of shortcomings, mistakes and lack of talents. A child’s brain, like a sponge, absorbs and identifies itself with everything that is told to it. He does not share the concepts of “I did bad” and “I am bad” if they shout at him. Growing up, the human brain is so clogged with imposed garbage that it does not hear itself at all. But other people’s beliefs and attitudes can and should be removed! A little practice: Draw a table with 4 columns. In the first column write “Negative attitude”, in the second column “Who imposed?”, in the third “When did you impose?” (approximate age), and in the fourth “Positive attitude”. This practice will help identify hundreds (!) of attitudes in various areas of your life. life, and replace these attitudes with those you yourself want to see them in. After this, it is advisable to reinforce the positive attitude with some kind of action. Returning to the example at the beginning of the article about the girl Ani, in her case it would look like this: I am mediocre - Mom! - 9 years - I am very good at drawing, this activity inspires me, I can do it simply because I like it. Action: I posted my paintings on a social network and received a huge response. And a small spoiler about Anya’s talent: how incredible She was able to draw pictures with precision, indicating that she would have an amazing career as a surgeon or jeweler, where this precision in detail is precisely what is needed, if only her mother had correctly noticed this. Book a consultation Marina Kritskaya is an integrative psychologist for individual and couples ( family therapy), Member of the ACPP. I will help with a deep understanding of issues related to the inner world and interpersonal relationships.Telegram: +7 999 233-28-97