Hello, friends! Let's talk about selfishness! Surely each of us at least once in our lives has heard or said the following phrase: “What a selfish person you are!” Or something like: “You can’t be so selfish!” For almost every person, this sounds like something offensive, painful, a reproach, an insult. However, let us here and now bring a little more understanding to this message. So to speak, we will “divide egoism into components” by talking about it in more detail. For What is this needed? First of all, in order to “remove” this tool from manipulators. After all, if a person is accused of selfishness, this is often done with the goal of forcing him to give more, to do what he (she) does not want. And oddly enough (and sometimes very logical) - it is toxic egoists (we’ll talk about this a little later) who tend to blame others. For a deeper understanding, let’s conditionally divide selfishness into: Healthy; Toxic. What do we mean by healthy selfishness? This is taking care of yourself first! Every person has desires, needs, aspirations, dreams, etc. However, each person is surrounded by people both close and more “distant” (society), who also have needs, desires, aspirations. So, returning to healthy egoism, it is important to understand that a person can first satisfy his needs, realize his desires , and then think (and do) how and what he wants to share with the people around him. After all, if a person first of all thinks about close (and distant) people, always puts their needs first, he loses a lot of energy, and restore doesn't have time to do it. All the time there is someone nearby who needs help, attention, care. If you first take care of yourself, “feed” yourself, then you will have enough energy and desire to give other people energy, attention and care. It’s like bringing people food all the time , but don’t eat yourself - pretty quickly your strength will run out and there will be no one to carry food to people. But what happens in the case of toxic egoism? A person is not only tuned to his own desires first of all, but for him the needs of other people “do not exist”. No one will receive anything from such a person (neither energy, nor involvement, nor support). There is only “I”, and the rest are not important at all. Moreover, such a person strives to satisfy his own needs not at the expense of his actions and efforts, but at the expense of those around him. And, oddly enough, it is precisely such a person who is inclined to accuse loved ones of selfishness and through these manipulations are to get something for yourself. Thus, you and I can generally understand that there are differences in the understanding of selfishness. And what to choose for yourself is, of course, up to you! I hope that this information was useful to you, friends! Your psychologist, Ordina Lyubov I invite you to my author’s psychological t-game “My Superpower”! Details here: https://www.b17.ru/go_4WM