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Client's story (told with permission) We started working with a woman on the request “Get through childhood situations, separate from your parents. This will make me feel light (the weight will be lifted from my shoulders) and confident in myself.” One of the layers of work: there was no acceptance of my dad. In words, almost everyone has it, because that’s how we were raised: we were given the obligation to “love our parents.” However, when emotions and feelings were revealed, it turned out that dad’s choice to live the way he lives was not recognized by his daughter. This explained the lack of face-to-face contact (“communication” through mom), the ban on calling her while drunk, and very long breaks in telephone calls. conversations. At the same time, there remained an emotional dependence on the pope’s opinion. The unresolved separation was reinforced by the operation of her father’s car. When we first discussed this topic, I highlighted where and why she did not feel like an adult and self-confident on an equal basis with others. The client shared her fear: “Is it possible that now I will have to give my car to my father?” Therapy on accepting my father, undergoing separation, healing her inner child and appropriating parental functions for herself proceeded gradually. The result exceeded expectations. What does it mean? This is when, along with satisfying the request, the parent’s behavior and relationship with him also changes. It is impossible to promise such an effect in advance, because no work has been done with it. It's like a "side effect" or an added bonus. Dad himself began to call, showing initiative and love in communication, caring as best he could. But the client also began to accept this love and stopped rejecting it due to inconsistencies with ideal ideas. And at some point, dad called and, explaining for a long time, apologizing why it was important for him to do this, asked to return the car. The client admitted at the session: “There wasn’t that fear, but there was confidence that I would buy myself a car and gratitude to dad that he was so helped me out for a long time.” How this transformation affected a woman’s life. In addition to the main request: to feel confident, grown up and live her own life, another important change has emerged for her. She finally admitted to herself that, having gone into a joint business with her husband, she had become “his shadow.” And she is a star and wants to shine.