The border between “working as a psychologist” and “being a psychologist” is most often blurred. If a psychologist is present in his profession, is passionate about it, then soon he will leave the profession, i.e. a way to earn a living, psychology becomes a way of life. Accordingly, the world around you becomes more “psychological” - for example, you begin to notice city crazy people more often or sympathize with children who, in your opinion, are excessively scolded by their parents. If a psychologist is friendly with professional boundaries, then he is more or less able to separate the professional and the personal. For example, do not “treat” or teach loved ones. But if for a psychologist such boundaries are an important stage in professional development, then the situation with loved ones and other surrounding people is more complicated. Expectations from others regarding psychologists are often exaggerated. In general, they can be described as follows: the psychologist does not enter into conflicts, is reserved, he knows how to resolve conflicts perfectly if they happen, he knows very well about himself and others and, accordingly, he has no problems. And because Since the area of ​​the psychological extends over almost the entire human life, the area of ​​application of such expectations is quite large. For example, for a plumber, his role or professional function appears when a pipe or tap breaks down, i.e. These are quite clear boundaries of his activities. And if they expect something from him, it will be help “for his own” in case of breakdowns and, for example, working plumbing in his own home according to the principle - “does well for others and does well at home.” In this regard, if the psychologist is still cannot come to terms with his own imperfection, still hopes to be beautiful and wonderful, then any discrepancy with this image will be felt very painfully. This often prevents novice psychologists from working with clients. For example, you can hear phrases like “I’m not ready” or “I don’t know much yet” from those who have been studying in various programs for years and have worn out more than one pair of pants in the client’s chair. In this regard, such a person more often has to keep his face and sacrifice freedom for the sake of a very abstract image. In the very first seminar about the distinctive features of the Gestalt approach at the third stage group in Gestalt therapy, the following feature was heard - “fucking as freedom.” It's like a presumption of fucked-upness. In other words, a psychologist has the right to remain himself and at the same time be a completely competent specialist. One of the pillars of this competence is the ability to tolerate one's own imperfections. And this is significant not only in terms of development. For example, I made a mistake - I went with the supervisor and became even better. For clients who suffer from toxic shame, who are practically drowning in shame, it is much easier to tolerate attention from a person who gives himself the right to make mistakes, is able to admit them, and at the same time remains resilient. On the other hand, a psychologist who tries his best to save his face risks becoming another unattainable ideal for the client, thereby putting an end to contact between two people. In the same vein, I consider it futile to try not to lose face in front of others, i.e. k., in my opinion, this will happen sooner or later. Mistakes will and do not happen only to those who are not involved in any activity at all..