How to be angry “correctly” for a teenagerTeenagers are often distinguished by their emotionality and impulsiveness. Irritation and anger are one of the frequent companions of teenage life. But these emotions have differences. Do you know about them? We easily notice anger when, for example, we want to attack our rival Katya from the competition with our fists because she received the main prize, which she “definitely did not deserve!” After all, it was you who had the best dress, made by your handicraft mother, and it was you who “danced the dance in the most wonderful way.” And “why did she win then, why?!!!” “Why did the jury choose her in charge and not me?” This thought haunts you, and tears roll from your eyes without stopping. You are angry, and you are very, very offended. You feel irritated when your neighbor Olya once again takes your phone without asking, saying, “Well, I’ll just be a minute, I’ll just check the time - how much is left until the end of the lesson.” And you don’t seem very comfortable talking about such a trifle. How to calm down and what to do if anger or irritation fills your heart? Interferes with normal communication and disrupts your life. Get to know self-help techniques. First, determine for yourself your current state: We do this in direct speech; “I’m irritated right now,” or “I’m very angry right now.” Determine WHO and WHAT exactly are you angry about? It’s one thing if it’s one person (a friend in the second example), another thing if it’s several people and the situation. Change the first phrase a little “I’m annoyed that Olya takes my phone without asking” or “I’m angry with Katya, that she I got the prize, I’m angry at the chairman of the jury, I’m angry at the partner who stumbled in the dance, I’m angry at the floor where there was a hole, I’m angry at dad for being late.” Speak out loud to ALL participants in your situation and feelings of anger or irritation. If it’s easier for you, you can write all the characters in your story on a piece of paper in a column. Pay attention to your body at the moment of anger. Turn on the internal spotlight and illuminate your entire body from top to bottom and say out loud again: for example, “I have a severe headache, my eyebrows are drawn to the bridge of my nose, I compress my lips tightly, I breathe short and intermittently, or I hardly breathe, my hands are clenched in fists, or my arms are frozen and tense, my leg muscles are tense.” You can highlight those parts of the body that react to anger first - remember them and over time, the signals from them will help you quickly identify your feelings. If eyebrows and lips are the first to signal irritation, then arms, legs, and headaches are the first to signal anger. Next, imagine that you can do anything! We do not have the right to cause physical harm to real people and objects, but in our fantasy and imagination we can do whatever we want with the offender. Imagine what exactly you would like to do with the “violator” of your boundaries - for example, imagine that you hit your neighbor on the desk with her hand reaching for the phone, or how you mentally push Katya away from the first place and stand there yourself. Imagine all the most “unthinkable” things you would like to do! Give this plenty of time. If you like to draw, you can draw these actions on paper. Find in your imagination a Helper from a fairy tale or from a movie, or remember a real person (your close friend, or mother, or grandmother), someone who will definitely support you in this situation. Imagine what he would say now? Maybe you would like him to help you “tear and throw,” or maybe you would like him to hug you and pat you on the head with some kind words. You can also write these words on paper: “I love you”, or “You are wonderful”, “You are very smart”, “I believe in you” If you still find it difficult to cope with feelings of anger and irritation, and you feel that you are in need if you need help from a psychologist, then write and I will help you figure it out.