From the author: The lifestyle of any adult, his habits, behavior and attitude towards the world around him are formed from early childhood under the influence of family values: children repeat the words, gestures and even facial expressions of their parents. It is not surprising that if a girl was raised in a family dominated by a mother who pays maximum attention to upbringing, then the daughter will most likely grow up to be a strong, energetic and caring mother who will be responsible for the whole family. If the father dominated the house, then the daughter will most likely continue to play a filial role: listen to the opinions of other family members, shift the burden of responsibility onto the shoulders of her husband. The behavior of a man is similar: if he was raised in a family where the father was the head, then the son often grows up as an owner, responsible for his decisions and actions. But if the father, for any reason, cedes primacy to the mother, then subsequently the son will take a passive position: look for maternal care in his future wife. In order to raise children capable of creating happy families in the future, it is necessary to correctly distribute roles in the family. The leader does not have to be a man, as has always been customary, the main thing is that the positions of the spouses complement each other, that is, the maternal care of the wife is combined with the filial habits of the husband, or the paternal guardianship of the husband with the filial obedience of the wife. However, a situation is also possible when the maternal and paternal care of the spouses collide, and then the struggle for leadership in the family begins. But, unfortunately, this struggle is obviously doomed to failure. The relationship between spouses is also difficult, where the wife plays a daughter role and the husband plays a son role: they are unable to bear responsibility and do not find support from each other, which leads to mutual dissatisfaction. Regardless of which spouse occupies a leadership position, it is useful to remember some rules: 1. Since the distribution of roles in the family is a personal matter and concerns only members of the same family, you should not pay special attention to standards and build “ideal” relationships. Society always imposes certain stereotypes, but you must develop your own values. Your family will be ideal if everyone takes a position that is comfortable for him. 2. If you do not agree with the position you take in the family, then it is a mistake to act with the help of reproaches; it is much more effective to show with your behavior and conversations what suits you. Thus, your spouse will understand what you need and in what conditions you feel comfortable, and will meet you halfway. 3. Since each person is individual, do not be afraid to show your feelings and emotions, your attitude to any situation. This behavior will help you understand each other's motives more clearly and, as a result, avoid many quarrels. 4. Do not rush to blame your spouse if there is any problem. Understand yourself first, because maybe the problem was simply created by you. Quite often, quarrels between spouses arise due to psychological barriers, which is why first you need to find out what is the reason for the quarrels. 5. Consumerism is not applicable to each other. You and your partner must have common goals that you will achieve together. 6. In raising children, you must choose a single strategy. For a child, you are an example, which means that his future depends on you. The distribution of roles in the family is an important task for spouses. The correct solution to this problem helps to create a favorable atmosphere for raising children and the life of all family members. I wish you happiness in your family! Olga Shiyan.