The idea of ​​incels and their rivals for sexual resources Introduction It is no secret that in our world, a huge number of people experience restrictions in access to the most basic resources that are our daily norm: 32% of the population do not have access to fresh water, 9.8% of people are hungry (do not have access to sufficient food), 38% of people cannot afford healthy food, and 13% do not have access to electricity, and up to 90% experience a shortage of affordable housing residents of large cities. Behind these dry numbers are the lives of millions and billions of people. They are talked about at the UN level and at the level of individual states. And this is normal: water, food, shelter and electricity are basic needs that directly affect a person’s physiological state. But there is another need that everyone hears in kitchen conversations, but which is not voiced from the stands - a lack of sex. And since the “tops” do not want to solve this problem, the “bottoms” got down to business. And their name is incels. Who are they, what do they want and is there any sound grain in their reasoning? Let's look at this issue from the perspective of psychology. Disclaimer #1: Due to my approach to work, it so happens that I usually advise people with intellectual work. In the last year, these have been mainly managers and IT employees. These are people who have spent their whole lives solving any problems “over their heads.” This approach inevitably leaves an imprint on the individual and non-professional life. I am engaged in minimizing the negative consequences of such features. And within the framework of the articles on this resource, I try to summarize professional experience and provide useful information. Definition and philosophy To understand the issue, we need to jump into the rabbit hole and understand the basic concepts that we will refer to in our reasoning. And we should start with the definition of the word “incel”: Incels (English incels, a merger of the English word involuntary celibates - “involuntarily abstaining (from sex)”) - members of a subculture who describe themselves as unable to find a sexual partner, despite the desire to do so . Incels place the blame for involuntary abstinence entirely on women, sometimes calling for rape. Freud would definitely have written a couple of books about this. Here it is necessary to make a note that incels themselves (and to write this article I had to sit and turn gray in a number of Russian- and English-speaking communities) do not agree with the definition that their views can be described as a subculture. They themselves position themselves as “men who have seen the light”, who have seen the imperfection and contradiction of the world, expressed in the relations between men and women. That is, from the individual problem of building relationships there is a transition to a global social problem. And therefore, it is more correct to compare them not with a subculture (conventional rockers or bikers), but with a political party. This self-determination is supported by their active discussion of the concept of “sexual capitalism” or, as the incels themselves more often call it, “vaginocapitalism”: Sexual capital / erotic capital is the social power that a person or group of people acquires as a result of their sexual attractiveness. You can also find a number several excellent definitions that boil down to the following thesis. And here there will be a more “incel” formulation: Vaginocapitalism is a social problem that arose as a result of the coincidence of a number of factors, such as: a shortage of women, the need for men to compete for sex, the perception of sex as a vital resource, the concentration of the entire resource in the hands, well, not the hands , of course, women As a result, we get a perception of sexual relations through the prism of capitalism, in which in order to access a sexual resource one must possess and be ready to exchange other resources (social, economic, etc.). By analogy with the conflict between capitalist and communist/socialist ideologies, incels take the position of supporters of sexual socialism (sexualism?). But hereThe question arises: if under socialism the means of production were nationalized, then what should be nationalized in the minds of incels? The thought arises that since the “means of production” is a woman, then women need to be nationalized. And not just their workforce, but the sphere of intimate life. In fact, incels advocate state regulation of the sexual issue (and the more “liberal” ones, so to speak, talk about equalizing the number of men and women, and the “radicals” advocate the legalization of rape). Karl Marx approves of the fight against capitalism... but themes and methods cause this sadness in the eyes. Further, the ideas of the above-described sexuality are confirmed by a free interpretation of facts from evolutionary biology, marginal psychological theories and pseudoscientific movements such as phrenology (ideas about the connection between the shape of the skull and personal characteristics). It is quite ironic that the withdrawal of women’s right to safety and their own definition of sexual activity is presented under the sauce of the idea of ​​“struggle for equal rights.” And now it’s time to talk about the personal characteristics of people who profess the logic of incels. Personal characteristics Let’s draw up a typical picture of a person who is fascinated by the ideology of incels: This is a man aged 18-35 years old, who has no sexual experience or has had rare, predominantly negative sexual experiences, and is confident in his imperfection or even inferiority. He attributes his failures in interpersonal relationships to innate (for example, appearance) or parent-defined shortcomings (for example, poverty). At the same time, he highly values ​​his moral qualities such as the ability to accept, love, and empathy. He often faces rejection from women and takes it hard and, perhaps, in the future he completely refuses attempts at interaction of this kind. The presence of more sexually successful friends and acquaintances nearby increases the feeling of one’s own inferiority. Gradually, he can reduce contacts with them. Since the desire for acceptance does not go away, he finds a society in which he feels like he belongs, where he is accepted. A community of the same sexually unsuccessful (I emphasize, unsuccessful in their own opinion) people with similar problems. Despite the fact that this is a community of sexually unsuccessful people, they do not want to identify themselves as losers. And they can’t, because no one has canceled narcissism in the sphere of their moral qualities. Sociogram of a typical incel community - not a single female figure and strong connections within the group And an interesting combination is obtained: on the one hand, the idea “I feel bad, my relationships don’t work out”, on the other hand, “I’m standing so handsome in a white coat.” This creates cognitive dissonance, which is unpleasant for a person. It is difficult to admit your incompetence in the matter of interpersonal relationships or accept some (perhaps even objective) shortcomings - for this you will have to take off your “white coat”. And the only available option when you can be “good and unhappy” is the position of the victim. The position of the victim is a term coming out of the lexicon of scientific psychology (due to its negative connotation and the risk of re-traumatization) that characterizes a number of psychological characteristics of people who have a tendency to fall into a dependent position or risky situations. Such features, for example, include passivity, inability to defend personal boundaries and delegation of responsibility. And then the logic is simple. If there is a victim, there is also an aggressor. The division into “friends and foes” in the oppressed sections of society is quite clearly expressed. And the stronger the division, the stronger will be the rejection of some people by others: We don’t have sex - you do! We don’t have financial resources - you have! We are beautiful inside - you are empty inside! We were born without a vagina - and you.. The feeling of injustice is absorbing, it wants to express itself in action, but is faced with a feeling of powerlessness. And here an important point occurs - instead of developing themselves and their skills of interaction with the world, incels direct their efforts towards self-justificationthrough conviction of the correctness of one’s position. In fairness, it should be noted that there are other examples that, unfortunately, are not at all encouraging: George Sodini opened fire at the LA Fitness health club. Three women were killed and nine others were injured. He allegedly expressed sexual frustration and complained of constant rejection from women; Elliot Rodger killed six people and wounded fourteen others in Isla Vista. Roger called himself an incel and left behind a 137-page manifesto and YouTube video in which he detailed his involuntary abstinence and how he wanted revenge for being rejected by women; Nikolas Cruz killed seventeen people and wounded seventeen more in resulting from the shooting at Stoneman Douglas High School. Motivated by other extremist views, Cruz had previously posted online that "Elliot Roger will not be forgotten." Elliot Roger himself, canonized by incels. A final question - can it be called downright unattractive? Based on the above, we can assume the presence of two dominant strategies of behavior according to the Thomas-Killman scheme: adaptation (renunciation of a claim to a resource and an attempt to delegate the solution of the problem to a third party) and confrontation (in the case of radical force addressing or approving rape). At the same time, the most productive strategies (not the only correct ones, but productive ones in most situations), such as compromise and cooperation, clearly do not dominate. In this case, we can talk about a low level of human adaptive abilities. What is the danger of incel communities and incel ideology? In addition to the radical decisions described above, leading to murders and suicides, the main danger is the formation of destructive rigid patterns of behavior associated with the refusal of responsibility for one’s own life, decreased self-criticism, the formation of a negative attitude towards the world and the people in it, increased stress levels, stereotyping people and a priori endowing them with negative qualities, desocialization. The combination of these parameters reduces the likelihood of a productive solution to the current situation and increases the risks of external and auto-aggression. Is there any common sense? grain in this ideology? Unfortunately, I don’t remember the name of the psychiatrist who said that delirium is not just a symptom of a psychiatric illness, but desperate attempts by a fading consciousness to somehow structure the fragments of reality into a system. Despite the fact that following the incel ideology is not a psychiatric disease (although it does not exclude it), I am a supporter of the idea that once an idea has arisen, there must definitely be a sound grain in it. Even if it has sprouted the most unsightly shoots. Let me remind you that incels consider the idea of ​​a lack of sex as a resource for a number of people. And having unhappy people is a problem for society as a whole. But even if we move away from assessing the incel community and its influence on the lives of other people, here’s an interesting point: the choice of a sexual partner, which previously had an objective genetic, economic and social background, is now practically divorced from it. Let me explain. Previously, when contraception was not developed, and sex was viewed more from the perspective of procreation or, at a minimum, in connection with the risk of unwanted pregnancy, then the selection of a sexual partner based on external attractiveness (a phenotypic sign of good health), social and financial success (a guarantee or at least a chance for the survival of the woman and future offspring) took place. But in the modern world, when a person can objectively survive alone or even as a single parent, and contraceptive methods have proven high effectiveness, some of the previously adequate requirements become irrelevant. And in the culture and our perception of another person, these requirements still persist. And this difficulty in separating the sexual from the social in the modern world is the problem that is highlighted by the very existence of the incel ideology. Conclusion The thoughts described above, in my opinion