Partners suffer and are tormented by the question of whether there is hope. When should they stop all this. How much time should be spent on restoring a relationship and how to understand that there is no point in trying anymore. The fantasy is that divorce will make the problems go away. The sad truth is that most people face similar problems in their next relationship. Not to mention the difficulties associated with divorce, which most people underestimate. The good news is that most problems are solvable. I personally am not against divorce. I don't think it's wrong. But in some cases, if the partners are interested, unhappy marriages can be changed. Therefore, before asking the question of when to get a divorce, you should try to improve the situation for the better. A crisis can become a real opportunity for deep and radical changes, it will help you look at the situation from the other side to see what you had not noticed before. Methods for saving a marriage These methods reflect the desire to change yourself first, and thanks to this they help save a problematic marriage. Solve the problem, do not distance yourself If you think that by taking a break from each other you will return to normal, you are most likely mistaken. After a while, everything will happen again. For changes in relationships, changes are needed. Distancing will help you return yourself to your comfort zone, think about something, understand something. It will help you see what you gained and what you lost when your partner left. Find out what works Problems do not appear out of nowhere, they have reasons. What actions of yours does your partner not like? Did you say what you don’t like? Maybe you play sports, but he doesn’t. Maybe you wash the dishes after yourself, but he doesn’t. Maybe you don't like that he doesn't laugh at your jokes, etc. There are real actions, behaviors and circumstances that both destroy relationships, causing negative feelings towards your partner, and create love feelings, so find out what it is in you case. Having realized what you both don’t like in the relationship, share it and tell them specifically what to do (within reasonable limits, of course). And when you share this with each other, don't say, “Why should I do this?” It may seem strange what you may be asked to do. You may think it's stupid, naive, or won't work. Get these thoughts out of your head. You know better what you like, as does he. More positive Having divided life into positive and negative moments, you need to make sure that for every 1 negative moment there are 5 positive ones. This way, the relationship will be more positive than negative and there will be more reasons to stay in it than to leave it. Creating Positive Habits Our behavior is mostly made up of habits. And what we don’t like about our partner, and what he doesn’t like about us, is our habitual behavior. Returning to point 3, having learned from your partner what you should do, make it your habit. Such events are very difficult for both, so try for him so that he will try for you. Burn the Boats Cortes and his people arrived on the coast, they had a battle ahead of them. Cortez ordered all the boats to be burned to make it clear to everyone that they had no way back. One would have expected that this order from Cortez would dishearten his people, but instead they rallied around their leader like never before. While you are trying to improve your relationship, put aside any thoughts of divorce. Forget about it altogether. Think that you have no choice and you have to. In the end, it's your decision, so you don't have to try half-heartedly. When to Get a DivorceSometimes you have tried your best, but nothing has worked out and your efforts have been in vain. Here is when you should consider getting a divorce: If you have tried the above 5 steps for a reasonable amount of time and nothing has changed, try at least three months of honest effort. But if your efforts fail, remember that life is short, don't get stuck. Responsibility for relationships.