Whether we like it or not, the past tenaciously holds us in its hands. Once created, neural connections are responsible for the fact that we reproduce old defenses again and again. For example, those formed at 1.5 years children's reactions to the fact that the mother goes to work and leaves the child with the nanny retain all the emotions of a 1.5-year-old little man, even when this child has long turned into a mature person. And the same feelings of rejection, pain, sadness and shame can be “turned on” whenever the husband/wife goes on a business trip or the couple breaks up altogether. "Mom, don't leave me!" - screams the childish part in the very center of the heart of an adult. In addition to the experience of our personal history, each of us is invariably influenced by ancestral survival strategies. Whether we like it or not, they encourage us to perform those actions that in the distant past helped our ancestors to preserve life, for example, stock up on food, flee, or freeze and “keep your head down.” It is precisely these generic survival strategies that are “responsible” for the fact that people, in periods of economic instability, for example, begin to buy buckwheat and flour in bags. Thus, a person is by no means a creature not free, but strictly conditioned by both one’s personal childhood history and the established scenarios of one’s kind. The question naturally arises - is it possible otherwise? Is there a choice of one path or another, one reaction or another? Is freedom from the past possible? Yes, freedom is possible! True, for this you need to have a high level of awareness, a lot of courage and a certain level of inner strength in order to get out of your own and ancestral stories of the past, in order to begin to write your own life script. And denial is simple giving it up won't help. On the contrary, you need to be ready to look into the eyes of all these stories stored deep in the subconscious, bring them to light and only then separate “yours” from “theirs”, and give good healing to children's stories. But even this may not be enough. Most often, a person has been living someone else’s life for so long that he is not at all “muscled” to live his own. He doesn’t know what he really wants, he doesn’t understand where and how to go next. It is this turning into his own life that psychotherapy serves. Having a strong intention and using various psychotherapeutic techniques, in tandem with a competent specialist, it is quite possible to get out of the conditioning of the past and begin to build your own life. And in my psychological practice, I often have the opportunity to work with requests of this kind, so if your time is to turn into your own life it's here - welcome!) Oksana Anashchenko, psychologist, constellation specialist, trauma therapist. The publication is protected by copyright - copying and reposting are not allowed. You can sign up for an individual session with the author of the article by message on this website or here - https://vk.com/oksana_khors This meeting lasts 1.5 hours and includes consultation, constellation and deep work with injuries.