Would you like your life to be like your parents' life? So that you and your partner have the same relationship as your mom and dad? So that you raise your children using the same methods that once raised you? I’m almost sure that no. Rather, the older we get, the more we blame our parents (or one of them) for the fact that they treated us wrong, did not understand our desires, were not there on time, which -they didn’t give us, they formed in us such character traits that do not at all contribute to a happy adult life. In general, they didn’t like me, didn’t give me enough, didn’t support me enough. Or, on the contrary, they overestimated, overloaded with responsibility, and set a lot of expectations. Or they were too critical, too cruel, too indifferent, too cold, too biased... And many more things were under..., over... or too much. And so we grow up, we understand the root of our troubles, and we inevitably condemn parents, we accuse them of insensitivity and wrong attitude towards ourselves. Sometimes it is an open conflict with mom or dad, when we remember our childhood grievances and seem to call them to account. And sometimes this is an internal claim against them, a hidden resentment that does not violate the external well-being in the relationship. And it seems that we understand that mom and dad hardly wanted to intentionally hurt us in childhood and ruin our adult lives. We convince ourselves that they simply couldn’t or didn’t know how to do it differently. Sometimes this brings some relief. But more often than not, we unconsciously continue to seek satisfaction of those same children’s needs in other ways, proving to everyone and everything that we are worthy of understanding, support, care, recognition, and trust. Making claims to parents in the hope that they will suddenly change is pointless . After all, the time when you were in dire need of protection, understanding, support, support, attention is long gone. You are no longer a child, and your parents are no longer the same as they were many years ago. And you need to accept the fact that they will never be able to compensate you for what you so needed when you were little. The care that you didn’t receive as a child. That love that should have been yours by right, but for some reason passed you by. A much more productive path is to accept this fact. And understand the ways and means of how now, already as an adult, you can be your own support, protection, support.