Try to observe yourself and others: how often do you hear WE in the speech of a mother talking about her child? How often do children in such conditions have problems with their health, with potty training, with speech, with adaptation in society, etc.? How often does a 40-year-old boy live with his mother or go into all serious troubles... It all starts small, from the very, very beginning: first, “We turned over” (as if mom was learning to roll over again), “We have cut our first tooth” ( It looks like mom, like a shark, has an extra row of new teeth at her age. There’s no time for jokes, of course), “We still don’t go to the potty” (I wonder how you manage to sit on the potty together?), “We do.” went to kindergarten/school" (You, an adult, went to kindergarten or school again? What nonsense!), etc. Please note that every mother who talks about her seriously ill child does not say that It was he who underwent serious therapy or surgery, but he speaks as if she herself took all the drugs at the same time or lay under the surgeon’s knife. WE ARE EVERYWHERE!!! The baby has no autonomy in such a situation! Therefore, everything is easy to explain: there is confusion in the baby’s mind about who is doing what, for example: “Mom always tells others/on the phone that we go to the potty. Do mom and I go to the potty together? But this is impossible! It seems like I was sitting on the potty alone, but she wasn’t, but she still says WE. Why should I go to the potty with my mother? I don’t understand it and I don’t care.” ? The baby's head is confused. He doesn’t understand at all what he needs and doesn’t need. Therefore, he is more likely to become irresponsible. His mother always knows and decides for him, not a step aside, without joint discussions. In such a “maternal trap” the child has no motivation at all! The child has no DESIRE! All his desires were taken away by his mother, who never wanted to get out of the imaginary relationship, i.e. to whom it seems that everything that is good for her is necessarily good for the child. He's on a leash, unfortunately. Mother and child are not mentally separated. Dear mothers and future mothers! If you want your child to develop normally, adapt normally to society and create his own path in life with his own desires, try to give him this opportunity, simply calling a spade a spade: if your child did/didn’t do something, then say so talk to those around you, on the phone to your grandmothers and girlfriends, about him. Praise even for the smallest things. Thus, the child will have the desire to reach even greater heights. With your support and recognition of him as an individual with his own desires, you will create a platform for him to have confidence in life. In general, the choice, as you already understand, is yours: stop living the life of a child and live your own or... Happiness to everyone from every real second