Modern society is gradually coming to understand that all feelings are important, necessary and useful, that they cannot be suppressed, because this is harmful to health and relationships. At the same time, it is not always clear how to recognize exactly what we feel and how to express it in an environmentally friendly and safe way for ourselves and others. Even experienced and wise adults face this problem. Fortunately, they have loving friends and family who can help. What ways are there to experience emotions and not hold back and close yourself off? Step 1. Recognize and name. Do you see your loved one’s tears welling up and their chin trembling, or their fists clenching and their shoulders tense? His body itself tells him and you what is happening to him. Draw his attention to these bodily manifestations and guess what kind of feeling they reflect: sadness or irritation, or maybe fear? By the way, there is not just one emotion at a time, but a whole cocktail. It is important to consider the differences between similar feelings. For example, how does resentment differ from sadness and anger, and how does joy differ from interest and pleasure? Help with your example: tell us what emotions you experience in certain situations, show how your body reacts to them. This will tell your loved one how to independently formulate their experiences. Step 2. Explain and accept. Suggest why this feeling arose, what was the reason, what the trigger was. Join your loved one in their feelings, tell them that you understand them, that it is normal to feel this way in the current circumstances. Tell us that you too had a similar experience (if so). This will help your loved one get rid of shame, fear and loneliness, because sharing secrets can be very shameful and scary, it may seem that only you are like this, and everyone else is doing well, everyone is coping better than you. Step 3. Live and let go. Depending on the feeling, you can resort to different methods of expressing it. In anger, you can hit a pillow or punching bag, cut or tear paper, sculpt with clay, run through the forest, scream and kick trees. In sadness, you can cry under a blanket, hug a soft toy, listen to sad songs, or draw. In anxiety, you can put things in order, make plans and lists, watch TikTok. In joy you can laugh, walk skipping hand in hand with your loved ones and family, and do good deeds. And a million other ways that you can create yourself depending on your values, capabilities and habits. The main task of this step is to allow a person to feel and be with him at this moment, not even necessarily next to him, just to be morally on his side. Phrases that can help: “I’m with you, I’m nearby, I empathize with you”, “I can imagine how you feel now, I see how hard it is for you”, “This condition will pass, you will cope, it will become easier for you, I will help you have to go through this”, “You can be angry, afraid, sad..., you have the right to this, I love you anyway”, “Cry, let me hug you”.