From the author: For many years I have been running the “Questions and Answers” ​​column in various publications in our city. I present to your attention the most interesting, in my opinion, questions. I have many questions that I think interest many parents. At what age should sex education begin? I have a five-year-old daughter and a slightly younger son. For now, they treat themselves and each other naturally, bathe in the same bathroom and don’t ask questions about intimate topics. Is it worth instilling a sense of shame? When is it worth telling them about why they are different, about gender relations? After all, in another couple of years such questions will appear. I'm afraid that on the street they will find out this earlier and in a distorted form than I tell them. Alina B., Almaty. Your question is very relevant and good. Indeed, is it worth or not worth telling children about gender differences, how and when to do it? For many years now, even among experts, there have been debates on this topic; there are different opinions and points of view. You are absolutely right that in the very near future your children will have questions, and by this moment you should be ready for dialogue on this topic. The more freely and sincerely you behave when talking with children about sexual differences, about relationships between the sexes, the better the children will develop intergender communication skills, including verbal ones, gender self-identification, and the emerging need for new knowledge, which they, as you noted correctly, they will still learn on the street, from older friends, but what quality they will be and what they are capable of cultivating such knowledge is a big question! And it is difficult to overestimate these skills, since they are perhaps the most important for a person’s full life. Children learn from birth that in this life people are divided into men and women and even earlier, when they hear our words addressed to them. From birth, children feel treated as if they were a boy or a girl. First in clothes - now literally from the first days you can see dresses on girls and jeans on boys, braids, hairpins, ruffles, bows are also characteristic of some and initially unusual for others. One of the many theories of the emergence of homosexuality speaks of incorrect intrauterine identification by the mother of her child. Those. Talking to children about the fact that they are different is not only possible, but absolutely necessary! I'm sure this is how it is done in your family. Nowadays there is a lot of literature in bookstores that helps in all cases of life. I recommend that you buy the “Sexual Encyclopedia for the Little Ones,” where issues of the physiology and psychology of relationships between men and women are explained in accessible children’s language. The book is intended for children 3-7 years old. The text is very touching and beautiful, I recommend reading it to all mothers and fathers who already have small children or are just preparing to become parents, you will enjoy it and you will know in what way to answer all unexpected questions on this topic. As for bathing together, there can be no definite answer here either. All children are different, their character and temperament are also different. Personally, I think that at the age of five it is already worth switching to an individual bath. It’s time for your daughter to instill feminine skills in hygienic self-care; come up with something for your son that is typical for men, for example, special water muscle training, which is so necessary for a real man, etc. Separate bathing is most consistent with hygienic standards. As for the feeling of shame, to the necessary extent it will be inherent in people with a developed sense of self-esteem, with a respectful attitude towards their body and towards themselves as an individual; these are the qualities that need to be instilled and developed in your children. Read good poems to them, do not hesitate to discuss with them the problems of relationships between adults that you have seen or heard. Children living in artificial isolation from the realities of life do not develop the skill of solving difficult situations and develop the so-called “emotional emotional distress syndrome.”.