From the author: My view on crises in relationships. As I have written many times, we go into relationships to satisfy our needs. And when we find a person with whom, in our opinion, we can do this in the best way, we offer him a relationship. And if he is also satisfied with everything, then there is a chance to start building strong relationships. There is just one important note - relationships are a process. Relationships cannot be built once and for all. Then what is happening with the relationship and where the crises come from and what they are talking about (more precisely, shouting), let’s figure it out. As long as everything is satisfactory in the relationship of both spouses (let’s talk about the traditional official family), then, as a rule, there are no serious disagreements in the family observed. The spouses manage to agree on the basic ways to satisfy their needs and everything is fine. However, over time the picture changes. A new job, health problems, the appearance of children (and these are individual people with their own needs, and unlike their spouses, they are not chosen), and simply the maturation of the spouses leads to the fact that those methods of communication, those methods of negotiation that the spouses used until now - they stop working. And then the first serious difficulties begin. It seems that you are doing everything as you did, but there is no satisfaction, anger appears at your spouse, and in response, as a rule, anger and misunderstanding. As a result, more and more negative emotions begin to appear and treacherous thoughts begin to appear - what are we doing together if everything is so bad. And here is an important point - you need not to pass the so-called point of no return, when there are so many negative experiences about a relationship with a given person that something good can no longer be considered. Then the probability of relationship breakdown becomes almost 100%. It is important when misunderstandings arise in a relationship to remember that this condition is temporary and is due to the fact that at the moment you most likely have ceased to understand each other, that the methods that you used for relationships before simply stopped working, it seems that you have already become others. And the main thing is that this can be changed, understanding can be created anew. And it is important that both spouses want this. One person will not make the relationship last. And so the crisis is just a hint that you have grown out of those panties that you once put on for your relationship, you need to look for and wear new ones. Otherwise, you may die, in the sense of a family, as a single organism. And the main rule in this case is to talk to each other, share with each other your emotions, fears, dreams, doubts, joy, anxiety, etc. You will understand more clearly what is wrong with you, convey this to your partner, and also find out what state your partner is in, what he wants and what he doesn’t. And then there is a high probability that behind all the pain, disappointment in your partner and in your relationship, you will find something new for your relationship. Something new that will allow you to look at life together differently. Of course, there is a more direct and cheaper way - to family therapy with a psychologist. But not everyone decides to do this and prefer to fill their bumps on their own. And this is their path. The healing power of a crisis is that you can move to a new level in your relationship, find new points and ways of contact with your spouse and experience new emotions, sensations that were previously inaccessible to you. There are a lot of facets in a relationship, most of which we will never come into contact with in our lives. Relationships are a mystery that every family has a chance to know. And your search for a way out of the crisis will always be rewarded. Good luck to you in this difficult matter.