How to choose a doctor for your soul? In my practice and observations, I increasingly come across the experiences of people who met with non-professionals when seeking psychological help, I observe colleagues who loudly discuss the problems of their clients in public places, or I hear from clients “diagnoses” that they accepted and resigned themselves to, because they trusted their therapists and accepted what they said, not paying attention to the fact that their whole being was saying completely opposite things. In addition, I very often see people’s questions and doubts before seeking psychological help: is it worth seeking help at all, will it be worse, and how can I understand that this or that specialist is right for me, how to check. All my experience and observations prompted me to write this article; it is intended both for people seeking qualified psychological help, and for colleagues, beginners and practitioners. When looking for psychological help, you can consider a specialist based on this algorithm and the criteria that I have highlighted. And as a practicing specialist, it is worth checking yourself for compliance with these criteria. Here we are not talking about testing for techniques and methods, in-depth knowledge of the subject, here, to a greater extent, I am trying to generalize the principles and ethical standards that should guide a specialist in the helping profession when working with people. I would like to note that in my article I in no way claim to have only these criteria and the need to flawlessly follow the specified algorithm. This is only an attempt to help understand the issue of choosing a therapist with the least loss for yourself, based on the ethical principles of specialists in the helping professions. The selection process is not lightning fast, it is important to approach it responsibly and study the information. Remember, you are choosing a person who will support you on the path of change in your life, help you meet and accept all sides of your personality, so it is worth paying a little more attention and focus to the search. So, the first place to start is to find several candidates of specialists for myself. You can turn to a specialized resource, it could be the B17 site, it could be a psychological help center, it could even be an Instagram channel*. Or it could be a recommendation from your friends and family. Choose for yourself 3-4 (possibly 5) specialists that you like, based on brief primary information. Now it is important to check the availability of education, study the methods in which the specialist works, the requests with which he works. Specialists, as a rule, have a website, a professional account (not on social networks, but in professional communities), and in most cases all information about education and methods is indicated on the website. At this stage, it is very important to check whether the specialist has a bachelor’s degree , master's degree in psychology and how this relates to the needs that a specialist solves in his practice. It is impossible to engage in depth psychotherapy with only a certificate of short-term training in NLP technologies in education. Pay attention to the methods in which the specialist works, whether there is this list, how many methods are indicated in it. A psychologist or psychotherapist always has main directions (theories) in which they work; as a rule, these theories overlap and complement each other. If you see a young specialist who indicates an endless list in his methods of work, and the main requests with which he works indicate “everything,” there is a big risk that you will find an “interlocutor” for money, and not a professional. Of course, it is not easy to understand the names of theories if you do not have a psychological education, but knowing your request, it is very easy to study the essence of the theory in order to understand whether a specialist practicing in this theory can help you or not. Pay special attention to whether the specialist has a personal therapy, how many hours of group and personal therapy have been completed by the specialist himself, on what topicscompleted group therapy. What additional skills and certificates does the specialist have, how does all this relate to the requests that the specialist takes on. Chose. One or two candidates. Now it is very important to get to the first meeting, whether it will be in person or will take place online via a video call (I do not consider messaging in this case). Pay attention at the first meeting who is speaking, you or a specialist. Typically, at the first meeting, the specialist completes the conversation with feedback on your request, recommendations and predicted areas of work (this is 5-7% of the total meeting time). If you listened to a specialist for almost the entire meeting, you should refuse such a specialist. Track the moment of discussing the rules, setting the time, day, and agreeing on cancellations and postponements of meetings. This is one of the most important criteria for professional work. Meetings must always be at an agreed time, day of the week and rules must be agreed upon by both parties. If a specialist does not monitor this, you should think about continuing to work. Free choice and recommendations. Your first meeting should end with your open choice, this means that you should not feel dependent or a strong recommendation from the specialist to come again, otherwise “it’s over”, you should be given a choice: “If you feel that you are ready to continue the work, then let me know about this before... (date), if you feel in doubt, you can look at other specialists for yourself” (here you may be offered a resource to choose from or given the opportunity to search among your sources) Pay attention to how you left, how the meeting ended. Another very important thing The criterion is worth noting whether your specialist talks about the experience of his work with his other clients, about specific situations in therapy with anyone. If yes, then run, it is strictly prohibited and violates the ethical standards of the profession. Even after a specialist is selected, you trust him and begin work, pay attention to what kind of feedback you receive, whether there are ratings in the words of your specialist, labels. The process of psychological assistance must be absolutely non-judgmental, neutral and objective. There may be times when your questions and the answers found to them will cause unpleasant feelings and experiences, but in no case should these feelings arise from statements belittling you, labeling or devaluing your experience by a specialist. Listen to yourself and your reactions. If you are told that no matter what your issue is, it will be resolved in 2-3 weeks. Please don't believe this. Even developing the habit of doing exercises requires 21 days of daily exercise. And consultations are usually held not every day, but once a week, it is easy to calculate approximately how much time it takes for it to “work.” The duration of a therapeutic session usually does not exceed 60-70 minutes. If you are offered a 2 hour job, be wary. The time limit for the therapeutic process is not made with the goal of limiting the client in expressing his thoughts, but with the goal of focusing attention on the most important experiences, working out a true request, and not just “talking heart to heart.” Since you have made a decision and made a choice to change your life and found a professional to help you with this, then take responsibility for tracking the results. After the first few sessions, it’s worth asking yourself questions: how do I feel, what has changed during the sessions, how close I am to solving my problem, to my goals, compare yourself before therapy and at the moment “here and now”. Listen to yourself and you will see where you are, if you work with a reliable and qualified professional, then you should find yourself in a state of development and qualitative changes in your life, perhaps not in all areas at once, you may find fear and uncertainty on the way to something new , but a positive change in attitude towards yourself will definitely begin. These questions are worth asking yourself from time to time during therapy, summing up.