Our personal core is formed in childhood. This is the most vulnerable part of us. But along with this vulnerability, some of us receive additional mechanisms for protection, armor, supports that help us live, move, grow, enjoy life, build close relationships without fear of threat, open our vulnerability to a certain extent and know that even if I get hurt, I can handle it. Where do we get these personality supports in childhood? Of course, from how we were raised by those around us (close people and the environment in general), what kind of relationships our dad and mom built with us, in what social conditions we were lucky to grow up. Some parents simply do not physically have time to interact with their children or they simply do not have these resources themselves to give them to their children. Very often, mom and dad themselves grew up in conditions where the priority was “at least to survive,” and then there was little room for the development of the creative sensual side, personal success and other things that make it possible to make their children strong. This can only be treated with respect and understanding. It is natural and normal that there are people who lack these supports in one situation or another. And almost everyone who has internal strength found these supports not in childhood, but much later, while hitting bumps, experiencing pain, learning lessons. There is another side, when absolutely all people unconsciously use certain psychological mechanisms at moments when they cannot stand the pain. They help a person a lot in such situations. Thanks to these defenses, a person does not go crazy and does not break down internally. But very often psychological defenses become fixed in behavior and begin to limit us, although there is no longer a need for them. It looks like a fur coat that you wrap yourself in to protect yourself from the frost, and when you go into a house where it’s warm, you don’t take it off and continue to sit in it, not noticing how it interferes. Therefore, it is very important to notice in time and rebuild these mechanisms in in our behavior to healthy ones. When a person lets go of what he no longer needs, he makes room for new changes, people and new vivid impressions. When we do not keep our shoulders constantly tense due to fear of attack, we gain the opportunity to face new challenges and enjoy life.