“I have always been someone’s daughter and someone’s wife,” says the heroine of the series “Scenes of Family Life.” The heroine is trying to realize herself as a separate person from others. She realized that she would never was on her own. Those around her and she herself have always associated her with her mother or her husband. This is a merger with the personality of her mother. I'm nothing without my mother. Mom knows best what I need. I miss my mom even when I go to work (you are not 5 years old). Mom can’t live without me, and I can’t live without mom. To the detriment of my interests, I will satisfy all her needs, as long as she tells me how good I am. I won’t get married, I don’t need anyone, I have a mother. Then the husband takes the place of the mother, and again the merger, without him I am nothing. My husband and I are one. I do everything for him to make him proud of me. I catch his every move, and I’m just already thinking like him! He's everything to me. He won't live without me and I won't live without him either. After the husband, there is a merger with the child. Oh yes, here he is this person with whom we are one. He can't live without me and never will. I gave birth to him, I didn’t sleep at night, now he owes me. And a woman can live like this all her life, not realizing who she is on her own? But when the children grow up and the woman suddenly realizes that she is now on her own. The children have found an object of imitation. And if the husband also leaves, then the woman is left alone with herself and understands that she is a nobody. Neither wife, nor mother... and what to do next is completely unclear to her. Sometimes there is a way out: go straight to the role of grandmother. The woman begins to cling to the children. Intervene in their lives, thereby increasing your importance. Calming myself, “I’m a grandmother.” Again the role, just not to be alone with myself. After all, there is no subject inside, but there is an object that can only reflect the opinions of others without having its own thoughts. In order not to find yourself in such a situation, it is necessary to undergo separation (separation) from the mother and father in a timely manner. Leave, or leave home, earn money on your own. Explore your interests. Determine what you personally like. Communicate with other people, choosing them according to your own opinion. Don't be afraid to express this opinion. Be yourself, don't try to live up to someone else's expectations. Merging with the mother occurs equally in men. They also suffer when there is a breakup of a relationship, if there was no separation from the mother, and may also suffer as their children grow up. You probably know such men? If you are faced with such a situation, you can come to me for a consultation.