A psychologist I know asked me to take part in the webinar “How to Find the Man of Your Dreams”, to work with the participants on the problems and attitudes that lead to the “wrong men” and to disharmonious further relationships as a consequence. I did. And now I present the material to you))) We all come from childhood)) And we “grabbed” 95% of our adult problems from there... But there is good news!: we build our lives either in accordance with or contrary to what we received in childhood. So I want to analyze these same problems in this article. So, prepare some paper (or better yet, a notebook) and a pen, and let’s start honestly answering questions and doing practice to work through the problems we’ve discovered! What was the relationship like between your parents when you were 5-7 years old? This is the age of sensitivity for the formation of a model for future partnerships. Did your mother love you as a child? (did you feel your mother’s love?) Yes. Then, growing up, you a priori acquire high female self-esteem, female success and seductiveness)). From a Princess, growing up, a girl easily turns into a Queen)) No. The problem of the Inner Child arises from the mother’s dislike in childhood. And then we try to be good for everyone, already at a conscious age (“Mom, I’m good, there’s something to love me for!” - a red thread that lasts a lifetime). Problem solving: “Practical psychology: talking to the Inner Child” https ://www.b17.ru/go_4iN4. Did your dad love you as a child? Yes. Then, growing up, you feel protected. You know for sure that you cannot be shouted at, much less raised your hand. No. From the dislike of the father in childhood, the problem of low self-esteem and defenselessness grows (( 5. Was there (was) a real (living) model of a Man in your childhood? If Yes, then great! Then, growing up, you will be able to a priori understand the role of a man in partnerships and, accordingly, create a harmonious relationship with him. If not, then it’s sad! In this case, an adult girl does not understand why men are needed in this world and takes all responsibility on herself in partnerships, knows where the proverbial drill lies, “adopts!” "of her husband. Or, on the contrary, she leaves him with only responsibilities (formed from Russian TV series), and chooses only rights for herself... Both of these lead to the destruction of partnerships (urgently see a psychologist!) 6. There is resentment towards Mom/Dad! now? If Yes, then we need to work through it, we don’t need to live and accept life through the prism of these grievances! We have only one life and it moves only in one direction... Working through the problem: “Working out (children’s) grievances” https://www. b17.ru/go_4iO 7. Settings. Blocks. Complexes. They all come from childhood and were created by our parents. And this is a time bomb. Later, instead of analyzing and correcting the situation of failure, we suddenly remember what we were told in childhood... The result is a conclusion about our inadequacy, unluckiness, lack of success, unluckiness, or a negative attitude towards men... Inferiority complexes are also formed in youth under the influence of life’s failures (lack of determination, timidity, lack of proper moral support), as well as unjustified self-confidence, which suffers a complete collapse when faced with real life. Problem solving: “Practical psychology: working through the negative past” https://www.b17 .ru/go_4iP and “How to increase self-esteem? Practical recommendations" https://www.b17.ru/go_4iM 8. Negative social relationships in the past: bullying, bullying. What to do? Work on it too: understand yourself, forgive yourself, love yourself. Not even that, but here’s how: Understand yourself. Forgive yourself. Love yourself. (and this is one of the points of lack of self-confidence, not to be confused with self-esteem!) All points of self-doubt are in the article “Self-esteem and self-confidence are the same thing?” https://www.b17.ru/go_4iQ 9. Experience of unsuccessful relationships. Understand: reasons, mistakes. You have learned a lesson from life. What is he talking about? Why? Problem solving: increasing self-confidence, self-esteem, love for.