From the author: a common request in therapy sounds something like this: “I find myself a partner with whom a serious relationship is initially impossible.” And this again is about the past experience of dislike that comes back to haunt the present. Once again, the therapist will need a lot of the healing potion of “empathetic presence” in order to, in contact with another, realize exactly HOW the person sitting next to him both wants love and does not allow himself to receive it. After all, behind the inability to build serious, long-term relationships, various fears may be revealed: being absorbed or dissolving in a partner; fear of affection that may suddenly end and be painful; fear that the way I am, I won’t be able to please “All you need is love,” sang the legendary Beatles. This simple phrase contains the deep meaning of human existence. To be loved and to be able to love. The essence of almost all requests to psychotherapists is the desire to receive love. Often this desire is so unclear that it is disguised as various requests. For example, “I don’t know what I want.” Beneath this ignorance is often self-insensitivity. And this is one of the manifestations of dislike in us. Almost all of us can quickly say that we should. This ability was greatly developed in our childhood. After all, few people were taught to slow down and listen to ourselves in order to feel what we really want. The very phrase “I know what I want”, as a rule, already contains a substitution of our true desire. Because we know from our heads, but we want from our hearts. And the inability to hear the energy of my true desire leads to a misunderstanding of what is really important to me. But it also happens that behind the request “I don’t know what I want” there is an unconscious fear of making a choice. After all, a choice is always associated with responsibility for the consequences of this choice. And behind the fear of making decisions, the experience of dislike is again revealed, when our failures were invariably accompanied by the phrases: “Where was your head when you did this?”, “You won’t succeed, I know you,” “You still want little, I know better.” , What do you want". Instead of the desire to express yourself, risking choosing something or rejecting something, comes the fear of making a mistake. Since it is not easy to admit the fact that I am the one who is afraid, our psyche turns on a defense mechanism - rationalization, and explains to us that we simply do not know what we want. In therapy, it will take a lot of the healing balm called “support and acceptance” to heal the fear of making mistakes. Another common request in therapy sounds something like this: “I find myself a partner with whom a serious relationship is initially impossible.” And this again is about the past experience of dislike that comes back to haunt the present. Once again, the therapist will need a lot of the healing potion of “empathetic presence” in order to, in contact with another, realize exactly HOW the person sitting next to him both wants love and does not allow himself to receive it. After all, behind the inability to build serious, long-term relationships, various fears can be revealed: being absorbed or dissolving in a partner; fear of affection that may suddenly end and be painful; fear that the way I am, I won’t be able to be liked. In the desire to receive love, during the session the client certainly demonstrates and acts out with the therapist the way he uses outside of therapy. And here the so-called “therapist’s feedback” has a healing effect, that is, his emotional response to the client’s actions and words. For example, after what words does he want to approach, and after what words does he want to close. In the trusting space of therapy, this exploration of relationships is safe and interesting. And the result of this joint research is most often the finding of a new, more optimal way of interaction, which the client takes out of therapy and implements in his life. But, in my opinion, the most healing drug for “dislike” is.