How do parental restrictions appear? Here's an example. We go to the site with lullabies and see Tanya Bulanova’s song “Sleep, my little boy.” Those. a mother can sing it to a child aged 0-3 years. Imagine that mom sings this song a couple of times a day, every day. Bye, bye, go to sleep, my boy The night has come, and the day is still further I quietly sing a song, a lullaby Don’t call the bear daddy Don’t pull his paw This is my obvious sin Dad Not everyone has it ✅Here we see mom’s guilt, the position of the Victim. The child immediately enters the game, the dramatic triangle, in the role of the Rescuer. It will be difficult to get out of it if you have been in it since infancy. What is the risk? A person is not free, he will play like this all his life, being either a Rescuer, a Victim, or a Persecutor. ✅Ban on close relationships. So far, attempts to build relationships with the bear, and then with other adults, have been stopped. Bye, bye, how long the night lasts when you can’t sleep at all Soon you will be big What should I do with you How to teach you I don’t know Become what I dream of You understand, my dear, How difficult it is for me alone ✅ Don’t grow up, don’t be an adult. People with such a prohibition find it difficult to take care of someone; they accept care more, are dependent, and childish. Or, on the contrary, at a protest they run ahead of the locomotive, proving to everyone how big they are. Both are scenario decisions. ✅Don't separate from me. These will be the difficulties of building relationships with girls. The presence of mother in the family. Difficulty defining your own rules in your family. In childhood - social problems, the child will be more withdrawn, limit going out for walks and communicating with friends. ✅Don't be yourself. It will be difficult for him to understand what he wants, who he is. Who does he want to work with, who does he want to live with, how to live? Especially during a midlife crisis, it will come back to haunt you greatly. Here the desire to change gender may arise. In Russia this is not so pronounced, but abroad it works very well. ✅You can also hear the devaluation of the child’s capabilities, that he cannot cope on his own, and even when he needs to take care of his mother. Bye, bye, oh, if only your dad could see who he offended. Could it be so easy to be far from us? Don’t trust, don’t love. It’s better to leave your partner first, so as not to experience pain. If a mother sings such lullabies and this mood is close to her, she should take care of herself. First, it is important to become the happiest, freest, despite the difficulties, then the child will grow up healthy, independent and happy. A happy family is great! Gennady Oparin, psychologist. I work in the Transactional Analysis approach.