I have one story that, many, many years later, turned out to be very therapeutic. It was unbearably embarrassing to remember her for a long time, but, looking back from the current point, I am ready to laugh at her heartily. I started working at the institute, from the 3rd year. I’m 21 years old, I’ve achieved honors at MGIMO, and I’ve got my first serious official job, which initially didn’t offer any concessions for students. It was possible to combine this only by sacrificing sleep and leisure, which I did with success, and at first with pleasure. There were 2 equal managers (partners) in the office. And it so happened that I made “contact” with one the first time, he hired me, our tables were next to each other, and in him there was such a “fatherly” concern for the junior staff and kindness with hints of jokes about the “young-green” “, but with the other, it didn’t work out in any way, so at least crack. Now I would adjust my pince-nez and state that the second manager was very, very toxic in nature, but when you are 21 and have no experience working in a team, you accept everything very close to my heart. On one of the working days, the second manager called me to his place, and in the atmosphere of thin cardboard walls of open space, he began to speak out in my direction in a very impartial form. I don’t remember what led to this conversation at that moment (obviously nothing fatal, I didn’t have such powers to mess up big time), but I remember that all my efforts in those days to do the impossible in order to become the best in the profession, to what end - to strive and grow instantly faded into accusatory and very harsh words. The rest of the day was like a fog and, somehow holding out until the evening, already at home I gave vent to my feelings with all my heart. I didn’t have the opportunity to have a heart-to-heart talk with anyone at the common table, but I had the opportunity to write a message to my dad. I wrote for a long time, pouring out my soul and telling everything in the smallest detail. Having jotted down an emotional canvas, I quite by accident...sent it to my first, pleasant boss. My internal pause (while the message was flying like a huge meteorite) lasted what felt like an eternity. Phones were not advanced back then; it was no longer possible to recall an SMS. Mentally, I was packing my bags to move to a place where they don’t know me :) Surprisingly, I received the most adequate answer, again kind and with a slight joke. From such a healthy state and attitude towards people that I immediately felt better. We met almost that same evening in a cafe and so adequately, sincerely and transparently discussed everything that bothered me that my further path was filled only with gratitude and the feeling that not everything in this world depends on the opinion of one rude person. I I thought for a long time whether morality was needed here. But, probably, without moralizing, I’ll write what was important for me in this episode: - this realization that my self-esteem will never again be built on the opinion of someone from the outside, but will be grown from within; - if I need an opinion about me or my work from the outside, I will choose for this person with a healthy internal position, who has no need to assert himself at my expense; - in order for boiling emotions not to wear you down from the inside, they must be poured out. And it’s best if there is a person for this who can listen to you impartially, carefully and attentively, asking the right questions and providing moral support; - rude, toxic, impartial individuals, as a rule, speak and reason from their own inner pain, resentment, jealousy, envy, and other complex emotions. This is difficult to accept in the moment, especially for those who are used to feeling guilty. But not allowing yourself to be manipulated on this topic is your internal task, and building personal boundaries is a solid foundation so that no thrown phrase, accidentally or purposefully, can throw you off track .How are you? Have you ever made a mistake sending a message? Tell us about your failures)