“Leave or stay? Relatives advise...” I can understand that now you are in a state where you really want to get advice. But remember that no one knows you and your relationship better than you. And only you can decide. Anyone who gives advice for or against comes from his own experience and personal experiences. For example, your mother may be very worried that you will be left alone. She may be guided by the idea that “you can’t live without a man.” But how does this idea apply to your life? Give yourself time to figure it out. It is not necessary to make sudden movements. “I love you very much, I want to forgive, but at the same time I feel despair, will I be able to forget this at all?” “My husband asks for forgiveness, says that he has realized everything, that he will do everything possible to get me back, and I tell him I do not believe. Will I be able to trust again?” Most likely, it is unlikely that you will be able to forget or erase your partner’s betrayal from your memory. But it is possible to forgive over time and now build a new relationship with a partner. Of course, it won’t be the same as before. But it will be new. And it’s not a fact that it’s worse. Cheating is a blow, but for many couples it becomes a new stage in a relationship, after which partners can become more honest, open, and remember their true selves. But this will require efforts on both sides. The initiator of the betrayal will have to compensate the partner for the damage. And it’s unlikely that flowers and a few apologies will get by. Most likely, these will be: - long conversations with clarification of why this happened, - repeated consolation of you, - specific actions that will strengthen your trust (perhaps at first - open access to your partner’s phone, video calls with him, family therapy, etc.), - new communication, - agreements on what the couple can do to avoid this in the future, - discussion of what happened in your relationship and what crisis moments each partner and the couple have. They can do this it will take months. “What awaits us next?” This does not mean that things will be exactly like this for you, but most likely, if you decide to maintain the relationship, you will periodically remember that very situation. You may cry, get angry, want revenge and hurt your partner. But it’s important to understand that it won’t be like this forever. Sometimes something in your partner’s actions will be a trigger for such states - for example, if he stays late at work or talks on the phone while going into another room. Certain places can also cause this effect. But if you continue to work on this topic on both sides, then over time there will be fewer such outbreaks. And the relationship can even reach a more trusting level than it was before the betrayal. “Relatives say that you can close your eyes, forgive, be smarter and not say anything/that correspondence and flirting are not cheating/kissing is not cheating. I'm confused, can this be considered cheating? Because it hurts me.” What is considered cheating is determined by the couple. For some, sex is not cheating. And spending money on some third person is treason. For some, flirting and correspondence will be scorchingly painful. And if, in your opinion, this is damaging to you and your relationship and creates the feeling of violating the couple’s boundaries, then yes, this is cheating. Phrases like “you take everything too personally,” “it’s just a chat,” “all men do this” do not justify what happened. Your feelings are what is important here. “If a person cheated, he will cheat again. After all, having tried once, it will continue.” This is a stereotype and a misconception. If the initiator of the betrayal seriously values ​​the main relationship and is ready to work on restoring it, then he may not cheat again. I recommend reading an article about the reasons for cheating. https://www.b17.ru/blog/348344/This will make it more clear that the reasons can be completely different - from severe stress to seeking psychological support in the person of a lover. Emotionally killed. Feeling like I’m going crazy. How can I help myself overcome this condition? The best option, of course, is to consult a psychologist. So, on the one hand.).