From the author: WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO “BE AT PEACE WITH EVERYONE?” This article is about this - listen to yourself.... and create an image of yourself with which you can relatively live.... ..How to understand others through understanding Yourself I am writing an article based on a dialogue with my reader, who has become a true Friend for me for more than 1 year. The main idea of ​​this article is not mine, but my Friend. And you understood it and raised it from the inside! Yourself, my Friend. You know what you are talking about. Although you are not speaking directly, knowing that I will understand You. And you didn’t just say this - you realized this idea based on your life’s trials. That’s why your thoughts are especially valuable to me. and ideas. And now I will be happy to try to express your idea. Since this simple truth has opened up a new dimension of familiar meaning for me...... Once again, I thank you so much, my dear readers and clients. and patients have addressed and are addressing various requests, according to my professional qualifications. And almost EVERYONE is looking and waiting for an answer from the outside. Because the reasons for their difficulties or problems seem to have come from outside, or THEY perceive them this way, according to their needs. Do you know what I mean? For example, requests about conflict in the family....a salary increase......starting a family......psychosomatics.....depression....PA - the client sees the cause of his illness from the outside: - the husband is like that - all sorts of things...- everywhere I work - they cut my salary....- I can’t meet a normal person.....- they offended me at school - now I’m depressed....- I’m going to have an operation because I’m fed up with everything ......- I can’t sleep - my life is miserable.... - panic attacks - because no one understands me, they say I’m a simulator..... What are psychologists’ clients talking about? About the fact that someone... then, once, somewhere..... he did not treat them well. And even THOSE smart clients who know everything about themselves and do not look outside for the reasons for their failures or disappointments. Yes, and I myself - they say about themselves (no longer about others) something like this: - I’m open ... too - trusting ... too - I don’t know how to love ..... at all (too) - I love ..... too seriously....- always (too) doing good....to people- etc. etc. Everywhere this word is TOO MUCH! Behind this word you can hear condemnation, albeit not of others, but of YOURSELF! In fact, the word “too” is an indicator of exceeding the norm and therefore it is an indicator of a person’s difficulty (problem) - a kind of “Freudian slip”. And what difference does it make who a person condemns - others (outside) or himself (inside). They condemn you! In both cases, the person is not at peace with himself. Of course, if the focus of attention shifts to oneself, the process of healing psychotrauma occurs much faster and deeper. Since a person is close to the state of insight, or even in it (like, for example, a psychologist himself with himself). And yet! It is important here to understand what to do and how to do it - how to remove this difficulty-problem....how to reduce anxiety and increase the joy of existence. What to do and how to do it to the MAXIMUM and with benefit? Algorithm of your actions: - look again into yourself - find there your part of yourself that satisfies you - with which you will feel quite comfortable - and which can create boundaries in moments of danger from external stimuli. Be it living people, or situations - remember the comfortable state associated with the definition of this contented part inside you - “stake out IT”, namely: - give it the right to exist (a psychologist will help with this) - to Life - to the main role in your life - it is easy to determine this part - by the comfort within yourself - remember this comfortable feeling - consolidate this comfortable feeling with a stimulus reaction - for example, inducing a state of comfort with a light clap of your palm on your thigh (or other way of contact with your body) - gradually the body will get used to it and will to know that after clapping your palm on your thigh, a state of comfort should come - this is how you activate your comfortably satisfied part in yourself. Now all that remains is to bring this to automaticity with daily training. Having made friends with.