From the author: Article published WHEN SOMETHING IS NOT GOING GOOD IN THE FAMILY...Help from a family psychologist Every person wants and seeks happiness... Happiness is when there is a loved one nearby a person: a person you can lean against, with whom you want to grow old, a person whose features you recognize with tenderness in your children. But why, even after finding a loved one, do we often not find happiness? Why do differences in views, habits, advice from good relatives, children’s behavior, everyday problems (did they seem so insurmountable before?) destroy our relationships?.. We live in a difficult world, where there are quite a variety of difficulties that we have to face every day. And family is the place from which you can and should draw strength to successfully overcome them. It’s good to return to your family when you know that they will listen to you, understand you, and support you. Here you are accepted and loved for who you are. Here you can relax and be yourself. You are not alone in the family. So it’s easier to cope with difficulties and there’s someone to share joy with. Isn’t that what most of us expect from our family when we get married? And it’s true: a healthy family is the best psychotherapist. In a difficult life situation, in a harmonious family, a person can receive everything he needs to recover: he has someone to share his experiences and emotions with. In prosperous periods, family is an excellent opportunity for personal development and growth: just be open to the person you are with: they will definitely tell you what you can improve if you want, what you have not yet achieved perfection in:-) Humor is humor, but good A functioning family can indeed help a person with most of the problems with which they turn to a psychologist. This is a huge resource that can and should help people be happy and satisfied with life. Unfortunately, in reality, sometimes things don’t work out exactly the way you want. In the worst case, the family becomes not a place where you can relax and stock up on positive emotions, but a prison from which you want to escape. Yes, this happens. The husband (wife) does not understand, the children behave badly, relatives interfere and add fuel to the fire of an already difficult relationship. What joy and peace there is... And it’s hard for everyone in such a family. People are together, but as if not at the same time. It turns out that the family does not fulfill its purpose: it does not make these people living together happier, it does not help them live. But here is another situation. Let’s say everything is not so bad: people are, in principle, happy with each other and their life together. But there is something that poisons their lives. What could it be: it is difficult to find mutual understanding with the child, or there is some reason for constant conflicts between the spouses among themselves, with someone else in the family, or maybe one of the spouses does not receive what is very important to him in marriage... All It doesn't seem bad... but I would like it to be better. Or maybe we don’t need to do better, as they say, “they don’t seek good from goodness”?.. For now, it’s tolerable, and since you can tolerate it, maybe it’s better to be glad that everything is not so bad, than to try to improve something? Or another argument that everyone has probably heard at some point: others have it even worse... A very common position: go with the flow. Until it gets really bad. More often than not, sooner or later things get really bad and you have to do something about it. Unfortunately, it is often too late: too much bad has accumulated in relationships, people have already moved too far away from each other... Well, maybe it won’t become completely unbearable, then the whole life will go on like this: it seems that it’s not entirely bad, but there’s also happiness family life somehow doesn’t add anything: it’s just a familiar way of existing. Of course, it can be like that. But why? I am deeply convinced that it is worth fighting for the family to fulfill the task that it must perform; would make the life of its members happier, fuller, more interesting than if they lived separately. And if you don’t strive for this, why live together? How to do this? There are many possibilities and family is sometimes intuitive.