In therapy, I quite often hear from clients about criticism. At the same time, it’s not about the fact that they are criticized, but rather about the fact that they expect this criticism or assume that they are being condemned for something. It's like fear of something that has not yet come and may never come at all. But there is anxiety about being judged. And I wonder: “How do you know that you will be criticized?” In response, I hear something about “I feel this way” or “I don’t know where, but it will definitely happen.” Then the question is: “Who really criticizes??” - “Of course, it’s me. I am a constant critic. I’m not happy with myself, I don’t accept myself and I’m trying to become better and better.” Hence the expectation that you will be criticized or judged. Everything comes from our attitude towards ourselves and our attitude towards others. Because often if I am used to criticizing myself, I also criticize the actions of others. And then in response I expect criticism from them. A vicious circle from which there is no visible exit. It’s as if there is some ideal image of oneself and the real self constantly falls short of it. It's like a race for something that doesn't exist and won't exist. But I’m so used to it and I don’t notice it anymore. The roots of this self-attitude can be looked for in the history of childhood (the attitude of parents, habits in the family, the period of school adaptation). The following questions can help: * “When and for what purpose was this ideal self formed?” * “Where does this habit of “chasing” perfection come from? "*"What did this habit give me before, when it was formed?"*"What does this habit give me now?"*"Do I even need it?" *"If yes, then to what extent and in what situations"? And of course, it is important to work on self-attitude, the formation of new habits (if you can call them that): self-respect, self-acceptance, the ability to give yourself the right to stop and take a break, the ability accept your result of activity as it is. I really don’t know what an ideal person looks like and I doubt that there is one at all. But I know that each of us is unique and interesting in the way we are now. Isn't that enough?