We are all different: in our worldview, in our habits, in our manner of expressing thoughts, in our vocabulary. When a client comes for an initial appointment with a psychologist, a process of adaptation occurs and a level of trust is formed in the client-psychologist dyad . These are two worlds that must, in a fairly short period of time, pass the line of primary trust and “go to work”, in principle, where the client came to work with. Let’s imagine a psychologist with a conservative outlook on life, he is an opponent of everything new, “ doesn’t say bad words” and is generally a good boy/or girl. And to such a psychologist, for example, a client comes: jeans in the “grunge” style (with holes), obscene language flashes in the vocabulary for the acuity of feelings, etc. He came to a psychologist and he has the task of working out something of his interpersonal or intrapersonal nature with the help of a specialist. How quickly do you think the client and the psychologist will pass the first level of trust? In my practice, there have been cases when clients said that another psychologist forbade them from at least occasionally using profanity to describe the situation sharply, because this is not good and it hurts that psychologist’s hearing. Or, for example, the client’s desire to stretch his legs, bend his leg(s) under himself (without getting dirty or damaging the furniture), caused a negative assessment and reaction from the psychologist. The client is not a first-grader on the school line and he does not have the task of being a /or seem good - he came for something completely different. This parental/mentoring position discouraged the client from continuing to work with this psychologist. Yes, each psychologist has his own scenario and program for conducting psychological consultations, but we must be prepared for the uniqueness of our clients. There is one exception, the client must behave in such a way that there is no threat to the life and health of the psychologist or the client, everything else can be by mutual agreement. Often, through negligence, clients break pens or pencils across the floor when describing a stressful situation. They will compensate the cost of this breakdown at the end of the consultation with gratitude, because... this item gave them the opportunity to “throw out, materialize” their aggression. There was a case when a client of my colleague broke a mop, the negative experience was so strong many years ago. Sometimes there are clients who are intellectuals, and here there are completely different words and associative examples. In the process of work, the psychologist must “be” in the client’s shoes, think like him, understand his microenvironment, understand the severity of his problem. This is an adjustment. The psychologist’s task is to competently find an individual approach to everyone, so that the client opens up as much as possible, then the work will go better and, accordingly, the client will receive the results for which he came. If a psychologist is taboo regarding profanity, has a monochrome outlook on life, according to the principle, there is only black or white, If there is only either good or bad, then such a psychologist needs to take a break and work through the “cockroaches” in himself. My advice is only advisory in nature, the rest is everyone’s choice individually. Sincerely, Your psychologist Olga Fedorovna Pokormyak http://psyolia.com/https://vk.com/club59839765