November. The air balances in the off-season. The days are getting shorter and darker. Everyday life is monochrome. I can’t even remember about vacation, but there are only more tasks every day. And the more tasks and darker the days, the closer stress and its faithful companions get: lethargy, lack of energy, irritation. What's next? Poor health, colds, conflicts with colleagues or at home, lack of mood. Is it possible not to “reach the limit”? They say that stress is the most common cause of illness and misfortune. But we will not go into the topic headlong, because it is multi-layered and has many causes and consequences. Instead, I propose an exercise that you can use in moments of irritation to return to calm and working condition. So, look at the picture and explore the algorithm Do you want me to tell you a secret? We play with emotions when we lose attention and get lost in emotions, but as soon as we shake ourselves off and call the emotion by name, it immediately loses its power over us and becomes much smaller. And the first thing that is important to do is: when you get irritated, notice that you are irritated. This may seem stupid or impossible from the outside, but inside the situation it can save it completely. For example, you are getting ready for work in the morning, and at some point you notice that you are already starting to be late, speeding up, and running out of the house. Then a light St. Petersburg rain begins. The bus to the metro gets stuck in a traffic jam, crowded with people. You hurry. And on top of everything else, someone carelessly steps on your polished shoes. You feel irritated. The algorithm tells you that it is important to let go of the situation. - What the hell does that mean? Should I get off the bus and walk? But it’s raining there, by the time I get to the metro I’ll be like a wet animal, and I’ll be even more late. Step on your foot in response? Should I yell at my neighbor for pushing him with his backpack? What can I do? This is where the fun begins. The third point the algorithm recommends is to stop participating in the situation, to stop feeding internal irritation. “I won’t stop being late because I yell at my neighbor or walk in the rain, unless I completely ruin my mood, unless something worse happens.” Instead, I can detach myself from what's going on outside and look at what's inside me. What's going on there? What exactly irritates me? Why am I getting irritated out of the blue? Well, I’m late, of course, well, they stepped on my toes, but I’m more precious to myself, and my mood is more precious to me. You can go even further and explore what annoys me. Maybe the fact is that this is not the first time I’ve been so late, and this angers me the most. Then pay attention to unnecessary things that I pay too much attention to in the morning. While you think about all this, the irritation will disappear, because you are no longer feeding him, you are breathing and thinking about something else, looking for a solution and a way to take preventive measures so that the next time it happened differently. The fifth point, the algorithm recommends finding something in the situation that will make you smile. Remember who you are like when you get irritated? For example, I look at a funny lizard, stupidly mincing its paws. I urge you not to try too hard, because efforts can lead to a new wave of irritation. Just try to use your imagination. Look around. There are clearly other irritated people left here, but who do they look like? Believe me, you won’t be able to smile and be irritated at the same time. And when you have already forgotten what was annoying about this whole incredibly funny “zoo”, look at the situation as a whole: without judging what happened, describe from the very beginning to this moment . At this very time, the bus approaches the metro, and you carry out the last point of the algorithm - note what has changed. And you move on with the thought of how you now know how to perceive irritation. The exercise was not invented by me. I discovered it on the Internet in a slightly different form, modified it, checked it, and now I’m sharing it with you. Your version of the algorithm may be shorter or longer, it is important to follow the basic.